“Are you happy now?” she hissed as she grabbed a pair of jeans from the shelves.
His eyes on her ass, he muttered, “What?”
She threw the jeans at him and he caught them when they hit him square in the chest. “This. Us. Yes, okay? I want you. Is that what you want to hear? That I dream of you too?” she choked out. “Your hands on me, inside of me, and I ache too.”
Ryan took a step towards her.
“Don’t.” She snatched the jeans out of his hands and tugged them on.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured.
Fin turned, rummaging for a top. She pulled one off a hanger and tugged it on furiously. “You’re sorry. I’m sorry. Everybody’s sorry. Well it’s just one sad, f**king sorry situation, isn’t it?”
Christ, Fin was a fiery inferno when she was mad, and it had his dick swelling even harder. “Fin, I—”
“Enough!” She jabbed a finger in his chest. “There’s hurt in there. I know it. You know it, but you’re not going to move on from it until you let that shit out. Whatever you’re doing now isn’t working. Own it, Ryan. Stop letting it own you.” With that she brushed passed him and opened the bedroom door. She looked at him over her shoulder before stalking away.
“Sizzler?” Fin moaned as Jake pulled into the restaurant car park an hour later.
Pulling the key out of the ignition, he turned in his seat and grinned at her. “That’s what you get for a last minute date with the two of us, right, Kendall?”
Ryan chuckled from the front passenger seat. “Right.”
Fin eyed the two of them flatly and reached for the door handle. She sighed as she opened the car door. “Let’s get this over with.”
“Don’t be like that, Fin,” Ryan called out as they got out of the car behind her and Jake beeped the locks. “It’s all you can eat. What could be better than that?”
She shivered at the wicked gleam in his eyes and strode briskly towards the restaurant door.
“I’ll tell you what’s better than that—if it was full of women instead of food,” Jake told him. “An all you can eat women buffet.”
Ryan said something she didn’t catch, and Jake burst out laughing. She rolled her eyes, shoving open the door.
Twenty minutes later Fin sat down at their table with a small pile of salad. Jake and Ryan followed soon after, sitting opposite her with plates piled high. Did they leave any food for anyone else?
She eyed them both in turn and then pointed her fork at their enormous food mountains. “That’s a heart attack on a plate.”
Ryan laughed and Jake grinned at her. “We work our asses off to eat like this.”
“And this is only round one,” Ryan told her.
Jake looked down at her modest salad with disgust. “Seriously, Fin. You don’t come to an all you can eat restaurant for the rabbit food.”
Her stomach flipped over when she met Ryan’s eyes. He was looking at her like she was a frosty ice cream and he’d just escaped the burning fires of Hell. She’d be lucky to choke down a piece of lettuce at this rate. “I’m not that hungry,” she muttered.
Jake shrugged. “So what movie are we supposed to be seeing?”
Fin finished chewing the dull tasting piece of tomato and after swallowing told him the title of the movie.
He shook his head. “Not happening.”
Stabbing at a piece of lettuce, she raised her brows and looked at him. “Fine. You don’t have to come.”
“It’s girly fluff, Fin. At least choose something we can all watch.”
Her lips twitching, she tossed a piece of lettuce at him. “What? You don’t like girly fluff?”
Jake used his fork to flick away the piece of lettuce contaminating his plate. “Not that kind,” he grumbled.
Later that evening, Ryan bought the tickets for the movie and Jake loaded them all down with popcorn.
“Haven’t you eaten enough?” she mumbled as the crowds of people swarmed around her. Getting jostled, she clutched the popcorn to her chest, watching some of it spill over and scatter carelessly on the carpeted floor.
Ryan looked down at her. “How can you go to the movies and not get popcorn?”
With Jake in front of her and Ryan behind, they walked up the dark cinema steps as a movie trailer blared wildly on the giant screen. She stumbled and Ryan grabbed her elbow to steady her.
Flustered, she murmured, “Thanks.”
Her heart pounded when his large, warm hand reached out and took hold of hers. She should’ve tugged it free, especially in light of her earlier anger, but the brief contact felt so good. He gave it a squeeze as Jake guided them into a row of seats, and Fin forced herself to let go when they sat down.
As wild gunfire and ominous music exploded in the background, Jake leaned in and grinned. “Now aren’t you glad I chose something we can all watch?”
Frankly, she didn’t care all that much what they saw. With Ryan sitting next to her, she’d be lucky to remember what the name of the movie was.
Torture. Sitting next to Fin in the dark cinema was complete and utter torture. Since arriving at the cottage, his desire for her had reignited and it had been snowballing ever since, growing wild and out of control until his hands, now fisted on his lap, shook from it.
Eventually the movie finished, and as they stood, he stretched slightly, the pull on his aching muscles from the morning’s workout easing some of his tension.
As they made their way back to the car, he hoped like hell Jake didn’t talk about the movie on the way home. He couldn’t remember any of it.
Jake glanced at Fin in the rear view mirror as he pulled out of the car park and asked her where Ian was tonight. Ryan felt like growling at the mention of his name.
“Long shift tonight at work, but he’s taking me out tomorrow night, and then he’ll be at the party.”
The farewell party. Ryan felt a dull ache pound through his temples as he stared at his reflection in the car window. Two more days of Fin and most of it belonged to Ian.
Whose fault is that, you dumb fuck?
He shook his head. Fin was right. He was still carrying around a load of hurt and he couldn’t let go of it. It did own him—that deep shaft of guilt, the pain that had caused his family to implode—had him in its grip. And until he owned it, just like she said, he could never be the man she needed—only the man who wanted her with every burning fibre of his body. The only question was how would he let go of the secret he’d kept hidden from the one person who meant more to him than anyone else? His Mum and Dad had turned their back on him and Ryan couldn’t blame them. What if Fin did too? He wouldn’t survive it.
Her cousin, Laura, sidled up next to Fin and muttered, “Smile, Fin. It’s your farewell party, not your funeral.”
Fin tore her eyes away from where Ryan stood across the room—so unbelievably handsome in his military dress uniform—and smiled at Laura.
A passing waiter paused in front of her, and she plucked a glass of champagne from his tray with a murmured thank you.
Her previous farewell party had been more of an impromptu barbecue in the backyard, but with both Jake and Ryan at home this time, her mother had gone all out.
Now here they stood under glittering lights, black tie and evening gowns, drinking and eating finger food while her stomach tied itself in knots.
“Fin?”
Fin sipped at her champagne. “Hmm?”
“Where’s Ian?”
She thought back to the conversation she had with Ian last night and swallowed the bitterness.
“It’s probably a good idea I’m not there,” he’d told her.
“But…it’s my farewell party. I’ll be gone early the next morning.”
He shook his head. “I don’t think I’m up for celebrating you leaving, baby.”
Rachael bumped her shoulder. “Earth to Fin?” She ran her eyes over Fin’s low cut, shimmery gold dress with admiration. “Glad you retired the sweatpants for the evening,” she joked.
“Ian couldn’t make it,” she blurted out.
Her champagne glass held aloft, Rachael raised a brow at her. “Why not?”
“Work,” Fin lied and tossed back the rest of her drink. The bubbles fizzed going down her throat, and she scrunched her nose.
“That’s a bit rich,” Rachael muttered.
Taking a deep breath, Fin plastered a smile on her face and nudged Rachael. “So where’s this so-called best present that ever lived?”
Rachael nodded towards Laura. “It’s from the both of us, and Laura’s already had Jake put it in the car for you.”
“You have to take it with you,” Laura told her, smirking in a way that made Fin nervous. “Don’t open it until you arrive at Casey Station, okay?”
Fin pressed her lips together, tears blurring her vision as she grabbed blindly for Rachael’s hand. She gave it a squeeze. “I’m going to miss you two.”
“Group hug!” Rachael cried.
They huddled in together and she saw a flashbulb go off. Then a hand grabbed hold of her arm and Jake was elbowing his way into their huddle.
“Quit hogging my little sister.” He looked down at her. “Dance with me?”
Laura burst out laughing at something Rachael said as Jake dragged her away.
One hand on her waist, the other on her shoulder, Jake twirled her around the dance floor. “How many whales are you saving this time, Fin?”
She rolled her eyes at him. “I’m not on a save the whale crusade, Jake.”
He grinned down as he spun her around. “Really?”
“We’re testing pollutants and the progress of climate change in the Antarctic,” she told him snootily. “It’s important work.”
“Preaching to the choir, honey.” His eyes softened on her face. “I’m proud of you.”
She nodded, a lump rising in her throat. “I know. These two weeks have gone so fast. I can’t believe I’m leaving in the morning.”
“Onwards and upwards.”
“You’ll take care of Crookshanks while I’m gone, won’t you?”
“That conceited ball of fluff will be just fine, don’t you worry.”
As the song started winding down, Ryan cut in. “May I?”
Jake took a step back and looked between Ryan and Fin. He gave a short nod. “Of course.”
As she stepped into Ryan’s arms, The Scientist by Coldplay started threading its bittersweet song around them. Ryan placed both hands on her hips, pulling her close, and she wound her arms around his neck. With his dark eyes locked on hers, the words of the song filtered through and tears blurred her vision.
“Fin,” he whispered thickly.
“Smile!” she heard her mum yell. Fin pulled Ryan in close and they both turned, smiling as the flash went off.
They started dancing again when her mum moved off, snapping more photos.
“Ryan, I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t say anything, Fin. Just … let me hold you, okay?”