He slid me closer to the edge of the bed and slowly pulled his shirt off me. His breath caught and he lowered me onto the bed as he shamelessly took in my completely nak*d body. Heat rushed up my chest and to my cheeks, my legs tried to close even though they were still wrapped around him, and my arms came up to my chest. It was one thing to not have anything under the shirt, but that had been like another shield to hide behind. And now that shield was gone too.
Kash’s eyes burned as he removed my arms, placing them gently on the bed, and opened my legs back up. “You’re so damn beautiful,” he whispered, and looked back into my eyes. “Please don’t cover yourself with me.”
My eyelids fluttered shut when his hands began their slow exploration of my body, and I had to force them back open so I could watch him. He sucked on his lip ring and looked up at me through hooded eyelids, and my body began burning for him. Sitting up quickly, I grabbed the back of his neck and brought his face to mine. Our kiss was slow and teasing, with soft bites and unhurried tongue strokes. I reached for the bottom of his shirt; he helped me get it off and I let my fingertips trail down his toned chest and stomach. I broke off the kiss to watch the path my hands were taking and only glanced at him for a moment when I began unbuttoning his low-slung jeans.
His erection was straining against the zipper, and my eyes widened when I pulled the denim off his h*ps and the only thing hiding him was a pair of boxer-briefs. I ran my hand over him and was rewarded with a low sound of pleasure in his throat. Letting the tips of my fingers run along the inside of the briefs’ band before pulling them lower, I bit my lip to hide my smile when his body shuddered. I grabbed his length in my hands and ran them slowly up and down, placed two openmouthed kisses on his chest, and looked up at him. He was breathing heavily, his mouth slightly open, and there was no doubting the look in his eyes.
“Do you . . .” I trailed off, the blush returning at my minimal experience with this.
Kash seemed to understand as he grabbed at the jeans hanging on his thighs and took a couple foil packets out of the pocket. “Mason’s good for something, I guess.”
I laughed and continued to work him with one hand as I pushed his pants and boxer-briefs off the rest of the way. He tilted my head up with his hands around my face, his thumbs brushing my jaw, and kissed me deeply.
“Rachel,” he whispered against my lips before pulling back an inch to look into my eyes, “can I have you?”
A lump formed in my throat when I realized what he was asking. I’d already told him I was his, but that wasn’t what this was. He knew about Daniel and the situation with Blake. One pushing, the other taking. Kash was asking. I nodded and squeezed my eyes tightly shut as I kissed him hard.
Pushing me farther back on the bed, he stepped out of his pants and tore open one of the foil packets. I watched as he rolled the condom on and reached for him when he finished. He grabbed the outstretched hand, kissed my palm, and intertwined our fingers as he crawled onto the bed and over me. I lay back and let him pull me up higher. When his lips found my throat, I wrapped my legs around his body and whimpered when his length pressed against me. He rolled his h*ps against me and I thought I would go mad if I didn’t have him soon.
“Please, I don’t want to wait anymore.”
He leaned back and positioned himself at my entrance. The hand holding mine gripped tighter and his eyes locked on mine as he slowly pushed inside of me. A breathy moan left me and he groaned as I stretched around him. Kash didn’t move for a few moments as we just felt each other. And with that lazy smile I loved, he pulled almost completely out and pushed back in harder. His name left my mouth and I brought his body down toward mine to capture his lips. Our joined hands were now pinned to the bed, his long fingers still entwined with mine and now clutching the comforter in them as well as we moved together. His other hand was in my hair, and his elbow was pressing into the mattress to keep his weight off me and give him the leverage he needed to move completely, but slowly, inside me.
My body was on fire for him, the heat in my belly growing rapidly. Our breaths were labored and our kisses were changing from slow and passionate to rough and needy. I urged him to move faster as I felt the familiar tightening low in my stomach and cried out when he leaned away and slammed into me. The heat in his eyes held me captive, and I’d never felt as beautiful or wanted as I did right now, in this moment with him. The hand that had been in my hair moved down my body, and the second his fingers rolled around my sensitive bud, my body shattered around him and I roughly whispered his name as I lost myself to him. He worked me through my orgasm, and when my body felt limp and sated, he curled back over me and placed his head in the crook of my neck. With a few more thrusts, his entire body tensed before shuddering, and he bit down on my collarbone as he groaned out his release.
His body was gently shaking when he pushed himself up, and I wrapped my arms around his broad back, bringing him closer to me. His arms gave out and I welcomed his weight for the moment before he rolled us onto our sides. Placing a soft kiss where he’d bitten down, he looked up at me and claimed my mouth next. We lay there holding each other for a few moments; the only sound was our heavy breathing as we stared into each other’s eyes. A soft whimper escaped my lips when his body left mine, and he kissed me quickly on the forehead before rolling off the bed and walking into the bathroom. He smiled when he came back in and saw me under the covers.
“I love seeing you there,” Kash said roughly as he crawled in with me. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me close to him. “Are you okay after that?”
I snuggled in closer to his hard chest and sighed happily. “Much better than okay. I—” I broke off and kissed his warm skin.
“You what?” When I didn’t respond, he tilted my head back and searched my eyes. “What, Rach? You can tell me.”
Wishing I’d kept my mouth shut, I smiled softly and internally cringed, hoping I wouldn’t ruin this night. “I was afraid I’d end up breaking down during. I was afraid he would find a way to ruin this for me.”
“Did—”
“No!” I cut him off quickly and tightened my hold on his waist. “No, everything with you is just—it’s perfect.” I shrugged and hoped he could see the sincerity in my eyes. “It was just you; I felt safe and cherished, like I always do with you.”
He kissed me softly. “I do cherish you. I love you, Rachel.” My chest warmed as I whispered my love for him back. He held me close and I was almost asleep when he said softly, “You begin school again soon. He’ll be there, and I—I don’t know how to protect you if I don’t know who he is.”
“It doesn’t matter. He won’t do anything at school, and you wouldn’t be able to protect me from him anyway. You can’t go to my classes with me. It just—it doesn’t matter. He won’t bother me there.”
“I wish you would tell me.”
“Why, Kash? So you can have a name? It won’t change anything.”
He opened his mouth but then shut it and breathed heavily through his nose. “Okay, I’m sorry. You’re right. I shouldn’t have asked again. I don’t want this between us right now. I just want you.”
I kissed his jaw and silently cursed myself for saying anything. Relaxing into his embrace and the pillows, I tried to go over every second that I’d just shared with Kash and attempted to push thoughts of Blake away. After a few minutes of my internal battling, Kash began humming “Fall into Me” by Brantley Gilbert and I felt my body fully relax into him. I hadn’t even realized I’d tensed up again.
His lips brushed across my cheek and he broke off humming to whisper in my ear, “Sleep, Rach. I’ll keep you safe.”
When he continued, he wasn’t humming anymore; he was whispering the words, and my heart swelled. Sleep came quickly in Kash’s arms as he softly sang to me. If I hadn’t been sure before, I was now. I wanted to spend forever with this man.
11
Rachel
WORK WAS PICKING up now that summer was coming to a close and more people were returning from their vacations. I didn’t have time to sit there just talking with Kash at the bar, but it didn’t matter. The steady flow of customers made the work hours fly by, and then it was just Kash and me when it was all over. We didn’t spend every night together, but more often than not, we both ended up in one of our beds. I preferred those nights. I’d never slept as well as I did with him, but with how raw our relationship was, it was good that we still spent some nights apart.
I grabbed for four bottles of beer and giggled against his lips when Kash leaned over the bar and pulled me in for a slow kiss. A few of the people around us hollered and a couple jokingly told us to get a room, and my face was bright red by the time we broke apart. We didn’t show affection often at work, but we had an understanding: if someone was hitting on one of us, the other made sure to let him or her know we were taken and not interested. My eyes glanced over the people sitting at the bar and spotted a few girls at the end who had witnessed the exchange and were whispering to each other. I couldn’t hide my smile and winked at Kash as I grabbed the bottles and turned to take them to the awaiting group of businessmen.
My phone vibrated in my pocket as I checked to see if they were ready to order yet, and after getting their order put in, I walked back toward the kitchen. As soon as I was around the corner, I pulled my phone out and my blood ran cold.
BLAKE:
I saw that
Oh my God, he’s here. My body started shaking and my breathing turned shallow. I looked around the empty, short hallway and had begun putting my phone back in my pocket when it vibrated again. I squeezed my eyes shut and pulled in two deep breaths before looking down again.
BLAKE:
And I didn’t like it. You seem to have forgotten whom you belong to.
A whimper escaped my throat and I turned to run into the women’s restroom. I threw up bile and continued to dry-heave for a few minutes before sliding down the wall to the ground.
“Rach? Are you in here, sweetie?” Tina appeared in the stall—I hadn’t had the time to shut and lock it when I ran in there—and her hands flew up to her mouth, then shot out in front of her. “Oh no, are you okay?”
Was I okay? No. I was definitely not okay. I was the opposite of okay. I was freaking the f**k out and coming dangerously close to hyperventilating and dry-heaving again. My hands shook as I pushed a few loose strands of hair away from my face.
“Do you want me to get Kash?”
“No!” Kash would flip the second he knew who was here. My mind ran wild with different possible scenarios. Kash beating the shit out of Blake and getting fired. Kash making me quit work and hiding me in his apartment. I never wanted to see Blake again, but I knew Kash would try to protect me and would go way overboard. “No, I’m fine, Tina. I just . . . got sick for a minute. But I’m fine.”
“You sure? Do you want me to tell Rod that you need to go home?”
Yes, I wanted to go home. But if Blake was here, he could follow me. And Kash was here; he wouldn’t let anything happen to me. “No, really. I need a few minutes and I’ll be fine.”