“That's not what I meant,” Diana replied. “I meant you don't want to because you want to go back home, to California, whenever you can. That's the truth, isn't it? You said you were planning to go to college there.”
“Well, yes, eventually, but…” Cassie had said that, that first night at Diana's house. Now she was no longer so sure, but she didn't quite know how to explain this. “What has that got to do with it?” she said. “I mean, joining doesn't mean staying here the rest of your life, does it?”
Diana's eyes were on the road. “It's hard to explain.” Then she said softly, “And in any case-well, I'm afraid membership is sort of limited.”
Abruptly Cassie remembered Deborah's words after Kori had left that day. One empty space, one candidate, you know? And Kori was part of the neighborhood. She'd grown up here. Chris and
Doug were her brothers. She wasn't a stranger taken in just because Diana insisted, a puppy picked up off the street.
“I understand,” Cassie said. She tried to sound as if it were all okay, as if it didn't matter. But it did. It did, terribly.
“No, you don't,” Diana murmured. “But I think that's better. It really is, Cassie, believe me.”
“Oh, no,” Diana said. “I don't have the Scotch tape. It must have rolled under the car seat. You stay here; there's no reason for us both to go back.” She turned and hurried toward the parking lot.
They were early that morning. Diana had a banner that she and Laurel had painted, saying “Happy Birthday, Kori.” She was going to hang it above the main entrance of the school, and Cassie had offered to help. Cassie thought that was a particularly noble and unselfish gesture, considering she still wasn't invited to Kori's party. It also showed how much she didn't really mind.
Now she looked up at the main entrance of the school building that had scared her to death two weeks ago.
Two weeks. The first week she had spent as a pariah, an outcast, someone too dangerous to speak to because it might bring down the wrath of Faye on the speaker's head. But the second week…
Diana, she mused, didn't influence people by frightening them. She did it much more subtly, with love. It sounded impossibly stupid and Hallmark card-ish, but it was true. Everyone loved Diana-girls as well as boys-and most of them would walk over hot coals for her. As Diana's adopted “little sister” Cassie had instantly gained status far beyond anything she could have ever achieved on her own. She now went around with the coolest crowd in school-and if she wasn't completely a part of it, only the real insiders knew.
You're almost one of us. She heard Faye's words to Kori in her mind again. Well, today was Kori's birthday, and today Kori would be one of them. Today Kori would join the Club.
And Cassie never would.
Cassie hunched her shoulders, trying to shrug the thought off, but a shiver caught her midway through. She wrapped her arms around herself, clasping her elbows. It was colder than she was used to for late September. Laurel and Melanie had been talking over the weekend about the fall equinox, which was today too. Melanie had explained that it was the day when the hours of daylight and darkness were of equal length, which meant the start of fall. Cassie supposed it had a right to be cold. Everyone said the leaves would be turning soon.
Melanie and Laurel had really gotten into that discussion of the equinox. It had seemed terribly important to them, although Cassie couldn't exactly see why. It was another of the little mysteries about New Salemers that were starting to drive Cassie crazy.
She shivered again and began to pace, rubbing her arms.
The hill spread out beneath her. She walked to the top of the stairs and stood bouncing on her toes. It was a clear, crisp day, and mixed in with the luxuriant green all around her she could see a tinge of fall colors here and there. The shrubs across the road-what had Laurel called them? Sumac. The sumac across the road was already red. And some of the sugar maples were turning golden yellow, and there was more red at the bottom of the hill…
Cassie frowned and forgot to rub her arms. She took a step or two down and leaned forward, looking again. The red at the bottom of the hill was almost too red, too bright. She'd never known foliage could turn that color. It wasn't natural.
A violent shiver went through her. God, it was cold. Whatever was down there was half hidden by the underbrush, but it wasn't a bush itself, she decided. It looked more like a sweater somebody had discarded.
It'll get ruined, lying on the damp ground like that, Cassie thought. Whoever owns it is going to be unhappy.
She took another step down. Of course, it's probably ruined already-or maybe it's just a scrap somebody's thrown out.
But it didn't look like a scrap. It had a shape-she could see what looked like the sweater's arm. In fact, it looked like a whole bundle of clothes. See, there was something like jeans lying below it…
Suddenly Cassie couldn't breathe.
That's funny-that's really funny, because it looks almost like a person. But that would be so stupid-it's cold and wet on the ground. Anybody lying down there would freeze-
She was moving down the steps quickly now.
Stupid-but it really does look a lot like somebody. See, there's legs. That yellow could be hair. They must be asleep-but who would go to sleep like that? Right beside the road. Of course, the weeds and stuff screen them-
She was very close now, and everything had gone into slow motion-everything but her whirling, reeling thoughts.
Oh, thank God-it isn't a person after all; it's just a dummy. Like one of those stuffed scarecrow things they put out at Halloween to scare people. See, it's all floppy in the middle… no person could bend that way… the neck looks like the neck of that doll in my locker. Like somebody pulled the head out…