"Ah," I finally got it.
"You can't tell anyone about them though," Jericho demanded suddenly.
"I won't," I sighed, defensively.
"Eden, I'm serious. You can't tell anyone," he said slowly and with more force.
"I'm not going to," I answered seriously, although I didn't really feel like I needed to explain that.
"Ok, enough with the twenty questions. Why don't you try to get some sleep, we're going to have a long night ahead of us," Jericho reached for the radio, turning on mellow music, but turning it up loudly so we couldn't talk naturally anymore.
I followed his advice, leaning my head against the cold window and closing my eyes. I was finished talking anyway. I didn't understand Jericho that was for sure. This road trip had been nothing but bizarre so far.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
"Eden, we're here," Jericho put a strong hand on my knee, shaking me awake.
I opened my eyes slowly and stretched. I was tired. More tired than I expected. I had slept the entire way to the border. My muscles were stiff and my neck terribly sore from resting awkwardly. There was a cold spot on my forehead from where it pressed against the window.
I sent a surge of magic through my blood, waking myself up and expelling the stiffness to my muscles.
"That was fast," I turned and smiled at Jericho who had removed his sunglasses.
The sky was overcast and black; I couldn't make out a star in the sky, not even the moon. I couldn't even see far beyond my window. We were in the middle of nowhere, completely alone.
"We are going to have to walk the rest of the way. It's a little bit of a hike," Jericho explained.
"Like, walk the rest of the way out there?" I gulped, taking in the midnight scenery and losing courage.
"Yes, come on. I don't want to be late," Jericho reached for a black messenger bag behind his seat and jumped down from the luxury SUV.
I followed suit, shivering in the cold desert night air. I used my magic to turn on my senses and examine my surroundings. We were in, what felt like, the middle of the desert. There was absolutely nothing around us except sand, rock and cactus.
Jericho took off walking on a dirt path headed south and I followed quickly behind him. Magic or no magic, I wasn't going to be left alone in the middle of nowhere.
We walked silently for an hour or more until Jericho consulted with a hand held GPS system he pulled from his messenger bag. Satisfied with our location, he found a few rocks to sit down on that surrounded a pit, that at one time had held a fire. There were half-burned logs and twigs inside, ashy and charred.
"And now we wait," Jericho answered my question before I got a chance to ask it.
"This is exciting," I exclaimed, rubbing my cold hands together.
"What is?" Jericho asked, using his magic to start the old logs on fire. The heat from the flames felt good and I held my hands out to them, snuggling closer to Jericho's rock.
"The mission," I replied, obviously. "Aren't you excited?" When he shrugged his shoulders, I continued, "You know, because it's my first mission and I've never been on one before, it's just very exciting! And I think we make an amazing team. They will probably want us to go on like, every mission together. Don't you think?"
"Well, enjoy this one, because there aren't going to be any more missions for you," Jericho threw a rock into the fire.
"What do you mean? Why?" I was hurt by his response. Had I irritated him by sleeping all day? Did he not think I was good enough to be in the field? Or was he still mad that I crashed a trip he was supposed to take alone?
"Future Queens do not go on missions for the Resistance, Eden," he answered, very condescendingly.
"How do you know?" I forced myself to be playful, hiding my hurt.
"Eden, don't play games. This is it for you," Jericho crossed his arms, and stared intently at the fire. "Tomorrow or the next day or whatever day Kiran asks you to marry him and you say yes, that's it. You're done with missions and the Resistance.... And you're done with me."
"Jericho, you don't mean that," I reached out, holding on to his arm.
"Yes, Eden, I do," he wrenched his arm out of my grasp, refusing to look at me.
"Why are you being like this?" I asked, anger and irritation finally catching up with me.
"Why am I being like this? Are you kidding me?" he scoffed at me loudly.
"No, I want to know," I crossed my arms defiantly.
"What do you want to know, Eden? Do you want to know how upset I am that you are not going to be around anymore, that I'm going to have to disappear out of your life completely? Would you like to know how scared I am that I won't be able to protect you anymore? Maybe you want to know how terrifying it is that you are choosing to hand yourself over to the Monarchy; that you are going willingly to be slaughtered and I get absolutely no say in the matter. Or maybe you want to know how hurt I am. Is that what you want to know?"
"Hurt?" I swallowed the nausea I felt rising in my throat. I didn't want to hear Jericho's answer, but I couldn't stop myself from asking the question.
"Yes. Eden, I fell in love with you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But you fell in love with somebody else. And he gets to marry you. And then probably murder you. But you'd still rather be with him than with me," he finished quietly, unable to look at me.
"Jericho, that's not fair," my voice was hoarse, and the tears had started to pool behind my eyes. "I didn't know you loved me."
"Would it have made a difference?" he asked, tipping his chin my direction.
"No," I choked, the tears spilling onto my cheeks. I couldn't even bend the truth for Jericho. I knew that.
"Why? Why him? Why not me?" he asked simply and I had to fight the emotion to answer him in a voice he could understand.
"It's not that it is 'not you.' And it's not that I don't love you too, because I do," I answered honestly. "Jericho, I do love you. But, not in the same way that I love Kiran. It's like he holds the missing part of my soul." Jericho shook his head and I rushed forward to explain, "I know that sounds cheesy, but it's the truth. Ever since I met Kiran, it's like my body and mind and soul have been fighting to get to him. And not just when we're apart; when we're together too. It's like this all consuming need; I need him. I need to be with him. What we have is love at the deepest meaning of the word. I didn't choose to love Kiran when I met him; in fact I wanted the exact opposite. But it's like I have always loved him, I just had to find him. He is my soul mate, nothing less. And I can love you or anyone else, but it will never be complete like it is with Kiran. It will never be my calling. With him, there is no one else. There can be no one else. And it's the same for him. Does that make sense?" I placed a gentle hand on his, hoping he would look at me and understand.
"No, it doesn't make sense," he grumbled.
"Jericho please. I don't want you to hate me. I couldn't take it," I begged him.
"Eden, I don't hate you," he turned to face me and the emotion behind his blazing eyes took me aback. "I just, I want you to know that I do love you. It's not something I wanted either, but it happened to me too. As strongly as you feel for Kiran, he isn't your only path; you have options." He was so sincere that I wanted to believe him.
But I couldn't. I had tried to stop loving Kiran. I had tried to stay away from him before. We were drawn together and our destiny was clearly not in my control. I smiled at Jericho wanting to explain that, to make sure he was completely clear that there was no chance for us and that I had chosen Kiran forever, for the rest of eternity. I opened my mouth, but a dark figure moved over the rise behind Jericho and I jumped, startled by a tall black man, dressed in dirty work pants and a worn forest-green sweater.
Jericho turned around and stood up, walking over to the man and reaching out his hand.
"I am Jericho," he said plainly and the other man took his hand warmly.
"I am Silas," the man replied with a thick Jamaican accent. He smiled and perfect, white teeth shined in the firelight. "It is a pleasure to meet you."
"Yes, for me, too," Jericho smiled. "Amory sent this for you," he reached into his messenger bag and pulled out a thin manila envelope.
Silas took the envelope and held on to it tightly. His eyes flickered my way, noticing me for the first time and his smile disappeared. He walked slowly to the fire, staring intently at me, his unsettling gray eyes never leaving mine.
"What is your name?" he demanded.
"Eden," I cleared my throat and glanced nervously at Jericho, who stood cautiously behind the man.
"Eden," Silas repeated out loud, saying the name carefully. "Eden," he said again.
Not sure what to do, I looked at Jericho. Maybe he was only told one person would be at the exchange and I had spooked him. I probably should have waited in truck.
"Amory was the one who asked Eden to come," Jericho offered, having the same thoughts I did.
"I am glad that he did," Silas reached out his hand to me and I took it, shaking it carefully.
When our palms touched, his magic ignited in a painful spark. I wanted to let go, but I couldn't. My magic was too curious to release.
"You are the one," he said, his gray eyes searching mine again, only this time they were friendlier.
"I don't know what you mean?" I looked to Jericho for help, but he stood there silently watching.
"The one. The next Oracle," he said gravely.
"I've been told that before," I admitted humbly.
"It is true," he affirmed and a shiver slithered down my spine. "It will not be easy. There is only pain ahead for you."
I tried to pull my hand away from him, but I couldn't. I was afraid and gave Jericho a frantic look but he was not moving.
"What do you mean?" I asked nervously, not really wanting to hear the answer.
"Pain and sorrow; that is your calling. You must fight through it, though. You cannot be the next Oracle if you let it swallow you whole. Rise up, great one. Rise up and find your destiny." He was squeezing my hand too tightly, it was starting to hurt.
"I don't know what you mean," I cried out in desperation.
"You must find me when everything has ended," he nodded his head, expecting a reply. "You must find me," he demanded.
"Yes, Ok, I will find you," I agreed.
He let go of my hand and turned around. He leaped into the air, turning into a sleek, black panther. I jumped back, not expecting his transformation. Silas, the panther, ran off into the darkness, not looking back and leaving me sitting dumbfounded behind.
"What was that?" I asked, feeling like I was slipping into shock.
"I have no clue," Jericho admitted, loudly. "That was wild," his mood had clearly changed for the better and I found myself irritated by that.
"He's all doom and gloom and suddenly you're in a good mood?" I demanded, standing up and stomping my foot.
"Oh, relax. He's just an old Shape-Shifter. What does he know?" Jericho laughed and I started to see reason.
"You're right. I'm being ridiculous," I shook my head.