“Gabe and I will handle it,” Chloe agreed as she looked at Gabe for confirmation.
Gabe nodded quickly in agreement.
“Thanks.” Tate looked at his family as he spoke. “This isn’t going to break us. We’re Colters, and we’ll ride this out together.”
Lara watched as Aileen’s backbone straightened. “Yes, we will.”
“Damn right we will,” Blake acknowledged.
“We’ll get through this,” Chloe affirmed.
“Your friends will help.” Gabe slapped Blake on the back.
Lara marveled at the strength she could feel in the small room. There was sadness, but a resilient spirit was also present. They all grieved right now, but she had no doubt they’d fight their way through this storm.
She watched them until they all left the room and closed the door behind them.
“You’ll really stay with me?” Tate asked with atypical vulnerability in his husky voice.
Lara had already spoken with her boss, told him she needed time to heal and to help the Colter family. He’d told her to take some time off. “As long as you need me,” she replied. Her eyes met his; she wished she could absorb some of the hurt that was still reflected in his gaze.
“Were you serious about that blowjob?” he asked hopefully.
“When you’re healed.” She tried to suppress a small smile.
“No…when you’re healed,” Tate answered hotly. His eyes roamed over her swollen face.
She moved closer to him, and rested her head gently on his abdomen, on top of the pristine white sheet. She felt emotionally wiped out, and so damn grateful that Tate was still alive. “I was scared,” she admitted in a guilty whisper.
Maybe she wasn’t supposed to feel that afraid as a federal officer, but she’d been terrified that Tate would end up dead. She took that risk herself every day doing her job, and she’d meet her fate if that’s what it took to get terrorists off the street. But her fear and guilt she’d felt about getting Tate involved was the part she couldn’t get over. To her, he was technically a civilian, and she’d gotten him involved in an FBI investigation that had nearly gotten him killed.
“In that particular situation, you’d have to be insane or completely stupid not to be afraid. You’re neither of those things, baby. It’s a natural reaction.” He slid his hand through her disheveled hair and massaged her scalp. “You’re the bravest, gutsiest woman I’ve ever known.”
Lara sighed and let her body relax for the first time since that morning, and savored the unexplainable connection she had with Tate until the nurse came in to check his IV and got Tate ready to go home.
“Were you really going to let that bastard put his dick in your mouth?”
Lara looked up at Tate from her position beside him on his big bed. Her head rested on his abdomen. They’d had a quiet day today after the last several days of the madness of talking to the FBI and trying to unravel everything that had happened in this terrorist attempt. They’d arrived at Tate’s home from the hospital four nights ago, both of them nearly falling asleep on impact when they hit the bed. Lara hadn’t questioned following Tate into his bed. She’d wanted to sleep with him, know he was there beside her and breathing. It had become their habit every night; neither one of them even considered sleeping apart. Tate’s wound was still healing, but sleeping together, having him hold her possessively in his arms every night, almost seemed more intimate than having sex.
The first day after the incident had been chaotic. After that, they’d done nothing more strenuous than play with Shep and visit with Chloe and her mom, who had come over every day to check in on Tate.
Blake was already gone, on his way to Washington.
“Yes, I would have done it,” she finally answered. Tate’s eyes turned territorial as he squeezed her waist. They’d spoken about the facts of the incident, but very little about the emotional toll it had taken on him.
Tate’s bedroom was illuminated by the fire in the big stone fireplace across the room from the bed, but Lara knew some of the sparks coming from his gaze were fury and not a reflection of the firelight.
“Why?” he answered huskily. “You knew the team was coming. You could have nailed the bastard even though your hands were tied. It’s doubtful that either of the other assholes would have shot you.”
“Because they would have killed you,” she admitted. His eyes softened as she spoke. “I would have let him rape me before I would have let them shoot you. I needed to buy some time. I did know the team was coming because I had texted them before they caught us.” Tate already knew that because they’d hashed over all the details of what had happened the day Marcus had been arrested, but he was finally delving into the personal, and talking about that was much harder than the actual criminal facts.
He grasped her chin gently and turned her face sideways so he could look at the mark the criminal had left on her face. It was now faded, nearly gone. “Don’t you know it would have killed me to watch that, see a man violate you that way?”
“You didn’t have to watch it.” She took his hand from her chin and entwined it with hers to rest their conjoined fingers beside her head. She wasn’t going to argue with him, but she’d do it the same way all over again. “I would have healed, and I’m on birth control even though I’m not in a relationship because being violated or raped as a female agent is always a small risk. You wouldn’t have healed. You would have been dead. It was my fault you were even there, that I got you involved. It never should have happened. You were Marcus’s brother.”
“Hey. Stop,” he insisted. “Do you think I’m pissed off at you?”
“You should be. It would be normal to resent the woman who broke up your family.” She put her head back on his stomach, not wanting to read his expression.
His hand sifted gently through her hair. “You did not break up my family. Jesus, Lara. Do you really think I could blame you for doing your job? Do you think I would have traded people’s lives just to protect my brother?”
She couldn’t stop herself. She tilted her head and looked into his eyes to see the truth. “No,” she answered honestly as she saw the ferocity of his expression.
“No matter how much I care about my brother, the right thing had to happen. You didn’t hurt my family. Marcus did. I’m glad he was busted before any lives were lost. My mom is hurting, but it would have killed her if her son had ended up being a mass murderer.”