"I have no idea. I only know that I want you more than anything I've ever wanted in my life."
"Ditto." She kisses my leg. "I wish we weren't so complicated." As soon as the word complicated leaves her mouth, we both laugh. "I know. Complication is exactly what you wanted to avoid and look at what it's done to your life."
I hope she's not suggesting we would've been better off not knowing one another because nothing could be further from the truth. "Come here, love."
She gets up from the floor and straddles me. I take her face in my hands and hold it so she's eye to eye with me. "I don't regret you for a second. You're my favorite complication and you always will be." I see the tears forming in her eyes as they begin to glass. "I knew you were the next one the second I laid my eyes on you singing in that club, but you can never imagine my surprise when I realized that you weren't just the next one—you were the last one."
Chapter Nineteen
He has no idea what it does to me when he says things like that. It tears my heart in two. I know I love him and I want to be with him more than anything in this world, but then I have this life I've only barely tasted. What if I give it up and then we don't work out? Where would I be then?
Alone without a career. I've been there and done that, and it was terrible. I'm terrified of finding myself in that predicament again.
My heart is racing. I know he wants me to tell him I'll walk away from all this and go back with him, but I can't. "I'm scared. Terrified is actually a better word. I wish I weren't, but I'm the only person in my life who's ever had my back. This is my way of surviving—to put trust in someone besides myself is to become vulnerable. I've never allowed myself to do that. I'm just messed up that way and I'm not sure I can ever be any different."
"I know you can. I saw your vulnerability when you told me you loved me for the first time. You broke through those walls you'd built but I let you down. And even though you love me, you're not ready to trust me wholeheartedly again. But it's okay because I'm going to prove that you can put all of your faith in me."
I would love that so much—to have just one person I could always depend on for love and safety. And I'd love nothing more than for it to be Jack Henry. "Please don't confuse my lack of security for lack of love. I swear I couldn't love you more, but I need time."
"I want you to have everything you want. If time is what you're asking for, then I'll give you all you need." He pulls my face to his and kisses my mouth so gently, I almost swoon. "I'll always give you anything you want."
I feel his erection sandwiched between us and I rock my pelvis gently against it. "Right now, there's only one thing I want, and you're definitely the only person who can give it to me."
In record time, he has us moved to the floor and I'm on my back with him dragging my jeans and panties down my legs. He's merciless when he drives into me so hard, my back skids across the carpet. "Sorry," he apologizes but doesn't relent as he pounds inside me. I'm propelled further across the floor with each thrust.
I loop my arms around him to hold on. "Never be sorry for f**king me this good."
"God, you're gonna get carpet burn if I keep on like this."
He's up from the floor and pulling me with him. He lifts me and deposits my bottom on the arm of the couch. I fall backwards on the cushions before I lift my feet to his shoulders and he's at it again. Damn. I'm getting f**ked while practically standing on my head, and it's pretty superb.
I should be willing to walk away from my life just so I can have this done to me every day. It's definitely something to consider.
He wraps his hands around my thighs and pulls me up to him as he drives harder with each thrust. "I meant what I said. I swear you are my f**king dream come true."
It's amazing how he can take the sweetest things, throw the word "fucking" in the middle of it, and I could melt into a puddle at his feet. If my panties weren't already off, I'd be dropping them after hearing him say that.
I don't have time to think of a witty response because he's thrusting into me those last few times. "There's nothing I love more than being inside you, Miss McLachlan."
Okay, that's a little different. Usually he just groans my name. This time I get a complete sentence, ending with "Miss McLachlan."
When he's finished coming, I slide up the couch and he sinks over on top of me with his body settled between my thighs. "I swear you don't miss an opportunity to get between my legs."
"No, I certainly do not, and that won't be changing any time soon." He reaches down and grins mischievously as he cups his hand over me. "This is where I love to be."
I slap his hand away because sometimes a girl just needs a little break. "You are an animal."
"And you love it."
He always says that. And it's true. "Yeah, I do."
"We have six days to ourselves before you're scheduled back in the studio. Do you want to do something special?"
I'm always up for anything, special or not, with him. "What do you have in mind?"
"I don't know. Maybe take a trip somewhere?"
I've been away from home for so long. I'd like to spend some time here instead of being gone all week. "Maybe if it was a short trip—no more than three days."
"What about Vegas?"
I like the thought of a little fun at the casinos. "I could handle a little R and R. Maybe do some gambling. See a show."
"What day works for you?"
I don't want to come back and have to roll into rehearsals the next day. "Can we do it soon so I can have a few days to rest before I have to be back in the studio? It's going to be hell on wheels once we start this new material."
"Anything you want. How about the day after tomorrow? Then you can be back to have the weekend to rest before you're in the studio Monday."
"Let's do it."
I've never been to Las Vegas. Until I started touring with Southern Ophelia, Australia and New Zealand had been the extent of my travels—and those were on someone else's dime. I guess this trip is too, but I don't feel quite so dependent. I could afford this trip if Jack Henry would let me pay. But he won't because that's just how he is.
We check into our hotel and of course, he's booked the most luxurious suite they have—the presidential, I'm certain. It's enormous and the decor is extravagant with no shortage of luxurious furnishings in shades of gold and taupe. The bathroom is majestic in matching tones of gold and the frisky girl inside me can't wait to see what Jack Henry comes up with for us to do in the gigantic jetted tub the size of a small swimming pool.