Oh, f**k! She wants details—in-depth ones. I hadn't planned on going into those kinds of specifics about my interaction with this woman. Now, I have no choice but to answer her because she has specifically asked. "Yes."
She squeezes her eyes shut for a moment before she opens them again. I think she's debating if she wants to keep going with this line of questioning, but she continues. "Were you?"
I don't want to admit being naked with another woman a week after Laurelyn left. Even if I didn't screw her, this doesn't look good for me. But it is what it is, and I'm guilty, so now I get to pay the piper. "Yes."
She's biting her lip but not in a sexy way—it's from worry. "Did you go down on her?"
I can't believe she thinks I'd do that. "Hell, no!"
"Did she go down on you?"
This is not the way I planned on this conversation going. "No."
"Did you use your hand to make her come?"
She's staring me right in the face doing that thing she does—invoking her human lie detector skills. "No. I didn't touch her there."
"But you did touch her?"
I swallow hard. This isn't going to go over well. "She put my hands on her tits."
"Did she touch your dick?"
Damn! She's leaving no stone unturned. "Yes," I whisper as I close my eyes. "When she rolled the condom on me."
When I open my eyes, I see the tears pooling in hers. I vowed to never be this person—the one to cause her tears—and I swear this is the last time it'll ever happen. I'll spend the rest of my life making her smile and laugh.
A single tear rolls down her cheek and I reach to wipe it away with my thumb, but she slaps my hand away. "Did she make you come?"
I shake my head hard from side to side. "No f**king way."
"Why do you say it like that? You said she put a condom on you. That means you got hard for her." Her eyes are narrowed at me. "Just how close were you to being inside her?"
I sigh heavily before answering. "Close, but I couldn't do it. I had my eyes squeezed shut so I didn't have to look at her. All I could see was your face. I love you too much to ever be inside another woman. I swear I did not f**k her. Please believe me."
"My side of the bed wasn't even cold yet."
I watch her face as she studies mine, and I'm terrified of what she's about to say. I decide it's time to plead for my life like I'm standing in front of a firing line. "We agreed we'd never see each other again and you left without saying goodbye. I thought we were over forever. I would've never gone looking for another woman if I'd thought I had a chance in hell of having you back in my life. Please forgive me, L. I love you. You're the only woman I want. Ever."
She shuts her eyes and tears roll down her face. "I believe you when you say you didn't have sex with that woman, but hearing the things you did with her is as painful as if you had. I can't imagine my heart hurting worse than it does right now."
She turns onto her side facing away from me, and I don't know where I stand. I have no idea what it means for her to believe me yet be so hurt by what I did.
I want to reach out to touch her, to comfort her. I'm afraid she won't allow me, but I can't stop myself. I scoot closer and drape my arm over her waist. She struggles to get away but I pull her to me tightly. "You're angry and I will take any punishment you see fit to give me because I f**ked up big time, but I love you and this isn't going to end us. We're bigger than this stupid mistake of mine and we're going to push through and come out bigger and better on the other side because of it."
She stops resisting and relaxes, so I hold her in my arms. I can feel the shuddering of her body as she cries and I'm terrified. I don't know what I'll do if she calls off the wedding. It's a very real possibility. I reach for her left hand to see if she's wearing her ring, and I'm relieved to feel it there. I bring it to my mouth and press it firmly against my lips. "Please tell me you still want to be my wife."
"Now isn't the time to ask me that question."
Fuck! This could be it for us. She may not be able to move past my stupid mistake. "No, L. Please don't end us. I'll do whatever it takes to turn this around."
"I said I need time to think." She pushes my hand away as she sits up on the edge of the bed, her back to me. "I want to go to Addison's for a few days so I can sort through this without looking at you."
I don't want her at Addison's, not with that little bastard who wanted in her pants living right across the hall. "Baby, please don't go there. Let me take you to Avalon and I'll stay in the guest house. You and Addison can have the house and I won't come back until you tell me I can."
"I'll talk to Addison and let you know what I decide." She gets up from the bed and goes into the bathroom. There's a loud thud when she shuts the door and it's a reminder that she is closing herself off from me.
My mobile rings. My mum. I'm certain she's calling to check on Laurelyn after her incident in the restaurant, so I can't avoid her call. "Hello, Mum."
"Hey, how's our girl feeling this morning?"
I'm glad she doesn't know what's going on between us. She would beat the shit out of me if she got wind of it. "She's feeling much better and is taking a shower right now."
"I'm so grateful to hear that. She had me worried. I've never seen anyone go so pale. Any idea what caused that to happen?"
"She has migraines and one came on after we left the restaurant. She got sick once we were home, so I think it could be associated with that." It's not a lie.
"That sounds like a very probable explanation. We have plans to do wedding shopping today and Chloe wants to prepare some of the wedding food for her to sample this evening. Did she mention if she felt well enough to do that?" I highly doubt it.
I rack my brain for a way to cover my foolish mistake. "She didn't, but I have to be back at Avalon this afternoon. Maybe I can bring her next weekend." That is, if she hasn't left me by then.
"Why don't you go on back and I can drive her home in a few days after we've worn her out shopping?"
I don't think Laurelyn's gonna go for that. She isn't going to want to spend the next few days shopping for our wedding, but I don't have a reasonable excuse to give my mum. "I'll ask her when she gets out of the shower and have her call you back."
"Okay."
I end the call but dread telling Laurelyn about Mum's suggestion because I don't want to hear her response—my reality check for how she's considering calling off our wedding. I sit motionless on the bed until I hear the shower turn off. I consider knocking on the door but decide it's best if I wait until she comes out.