I scrunched my brows as I looked around with only my eyes, careful to keep my aching neck still. "Why are we back here?" My words were coming out sounding all weird, my tongue still seeming like it didn't fit in my body correctly and my throat raspy, like I was a lifelong smoker all of a sudden.
His hands cupped my cheeks as his eyes watered. "Do you remember...anything?"
I carefully lifted my hand and placed it over his, my warmth seeping through his coolness, so that I felt it on my cheek. "Don't be scared, Teren...I'm fine." He tried to adjust his face so he looked carefree and untroubled, but I saw the lie behind it. I saw the tension in his jaw, the tightness of his eyes; I could almost smell the fear on him. "I remember...a little. I remember being held down and I remember teeth..."
I closed my eyes as the memory of the attack seared through me. I'd thought it was over. I was positive when I'd felt the viciousness and brutality of the bite, nothing like Teren's love nips, that I was done. Teren's cool head came down to rest on mine. "I'm so sorry, Emma. It happened so fast. I didn't see it coming. I didn't know he was going to..."
I switched my hand to his chest and pushed him back so I could look at him. "It's okay, Teren...I'm fine." Dead thirsty and like I was in a possessed body, but fine. I was alive at any rate and so were our children. That equaled fine in my book.
A look passed over his eyes that I swear was guilt, and he looked down at the pillows. Feeling an odd tension building, I jokingly muttered, "Did anyone stake the bastard?"
He looked up at me, a slight crooked grin on his lips. "You won't believe me."
Preferring that face to his worried or guilty face, I dropped my hand back to my belly and gave him an odd-feeling smile, or tried to anyway. "Tell me." Pain seared through me, but I tried to ignore it, not wanting Teren to feel bad, and not wanting him to leave my side just yet. I'd been too close to losing him once tonight already, when I'd been sure I was dead.
He sighed at the look of restrained pain on my face and oddly avoided looking me directly in the eye, but he continued with his story, maybe also not wanting to leave me yet. He lightly shook his head, his wry smile returning. "Ben." My brow furrowed and I tried to shake my head, but immediately stopped at the jolt of pain that gave me.
Teren bit his lip as he looked over my face, but explained before I could ask him to. He sighed and rolled his eyes, a small grin returning to his otherwise almost tragic face. "I guess Ben has taken to arming himself when he goes out." He shook his head, his eyes locking onto my neck. "This time...it was warranted." He looked up at me, and I got the feeling he was making himself meet my gaze. "The whole time he was watching the...conversation, he was clutching a stake in his pocket. When that vamp moved, he automatically swung." Teren raised an eyebrow at me and lost what little grin he'd had. "He pierced his heart, through his back." Then the smirk returned and he nodded his head towards the door. "He's still here, downstairs...drinking heavily. He won't leave until he knows that you're okay." He shrugged and sighed. "I think he's just too freaked out to do anything else yet."
My mouth dropped wide open. I cringed at the wave of pain that ran through my shoulder up to my jaw and Teren averted his eyes. "Ben?" I croaked out, momentarily ignoring my pain over my shock. "Scaredy-cat Ben staked a vamp?" From somewhere, I swear I heard a husky laugh. I also thought I could hear the sounds of people rustling and lowly talking, but I pushed out my imagined hearing as I focused on my husband. Teren looked up at me, a half-smile slipping off his face as he looked me over. I carefully closed my mouth; it felt odd to do so. "You're right, I don't believe you."
Teren's eyes were oddly locked onto my mouth, so I tried to smile for him, to reassure him, since he seemed to be having major guilt over the attack. My mouth still felt odd and thick though, so I gave up the feeble attempt, that didn't appear to be reassuring him anyway. I reached over and grabbed his cool hand, lacing our fingers together.
He raised his eyes to mine and swallowed. He also tried a brief reassuring smile, but it quickly fell off of him too as he swept his eyes over my face. I wasn't sure what he was seeing, but it must have been bad. He bit his lip and he looked on the verge of actually crying. "Emma..." He stopped and swallowed again. "I...I don't know how to..." His voice trailed off and he sighed and ran a hand down his face.
I reached my other hand out weakly and stroked my thumb over his cheek as I pulled him towards me. "I know, Teren." He'd been gone from my arms from too long and I needed him closer. Whatever guilt he was feeling over me being assaulted, he needed to let it go. I needed him. I needed his reassurance. Understanding my need, or maybe needing it to, his arms carefully went around me and he held me tight. The coolness of his body felt good on my aches and pains and I sighed and relaxed slightly at the comfort of his familiar touch.
With his head buried in my uninjured shoulder and no longer able to look at me, Teren finally found the words he was looking for. "He bit you, Emma...there was so much blood loss. I heard it...I heard it all being taken from you." I felt a sob break free in his chest and clutched at him. I hadn't considered what the attack would have felt and sounded like to Teren. Being so attuned to my blood, he was probably aware of exactly how many units I'd been depleted of. He must have been so scared for me, much like the time I'd been terrified for him, during his conversion.
I stroked his back as I comforted him. "It's all okay now, Teren."
His head rested in the crook of my neck and he started lightly shaking it back and forth. "He took so much blood, Emma..." I kissed his head, as best as I could with my mouth that felt full of marbles and tried to shush him, but he said it again. "He took so much blood. I'm sorry."
There was so much guilt in his voice when he said that, that my nerves shot right through the roof. I suddenly had a horrid feeling that everything was not fine. I tried to swallow again, but my throat was fire. I wanted water...or a milkshake, something thick and creamy. I wanted to ask Teren for something to ease my throat, and the fire radiating from my neck, but adrenaline was pouring through me now and I was almost too terrified to speak. Everything was not fine.
Somehow, I found the courage to say his name. "Teren?"
He pulled back to look at me and again his eyes flicked over my face. Did I really look so awful to him? Did he really feel so guilty that he'd let a vampire get close enough to nearly drain me dry?
Nearly...
My brows scrunched together as Teren repeated softly that he was sorry. "Why...what did you do?"
He closed his eyes and I felt like I'd hit the proverbial nail on the head. He wasn't confessing his guilt over the attack, which I'm sure he felt a huge amount of guilt over, since he'd sworn repeatedly that he'd never let anyone harm me - an impossible to keep promise. But that wasn't what was making his eyes fill to the brim with tears. That wasn't what was making it difficult to look me directly in the eye. No, he was torturing himself with guilt over something he'd done, not the vampire...something after the attack. My brows scrunched further as I tried to understand. I couldn't. We were all alive - surely that was a good thing.
"Emma..." His voice was shaky and a tear finally broke over the surface of his beautiful pale eye and splashed on the sheet over my aching body.
My stomach twisted into painful knots while I tried to decipher his mixed messages. He was glad I was alive and he felt guilty. Why? "Teren, you're scaring me..."
He closed his eyes and exhaled slowly, gathering his thoughts and his strength. "You lost...a lot of blood. When his body was pulled off of you, even before, I could hear your heart slowing...your pulse slowing." He slowly opened his eyes and they looked aged, and for once, what they really were, dead. "You needed more blood..."
He swallowed noisily and ice filled my veins. "What did you do?" I whispered.
He sat up more, his hands going to my upper arms, almost like he was afraid that once he told me, I would make a run for it. Like my pain-riddled body could even do that right now. I braced myself for whatever he was going to tell me. "I'm so sorry, Emma...I wasn't thinking. You were going to die, all three of you were going to die...I panicked." He shook his head as he repeated, "I panicked. I'm sorry."
As the ice and confusion flooded my system, somewhere my voice broke through the pain and dryness of my scratchy throat and found volume. "What did you do!"
He cringed away from the heat in my tone. "I wasn't thinking. I just wanted to save you...like you saved me..." His eyes, still tired and remorseful, searched my face.
I was on the verge of grabbing him and chucking his dead ass out the window if he didn't tell me exactly what he'd done. "Teren!"
Maybe noticing my patience was virtually gone, he quietly said, "You needed more blood...I gave it to you."
I cocked my head, not understanding what the big deal was. "Yeah, so...like a transfusion or something?"
His twisted his lips. "Or something..."
The look on his face, the guilt in his voice...a past conversation filled my head, shouting through every fiber of my sore body and reverberating through every aching joint. My hand instinctually went to the wound at my neck as my body suddenly felt on fire and words tumbled through my mind in a never-ending loop:
"...drained of all her blood...replaced by a vampire's. Drained of all her blood...replaced by a vampire's..."
Replaced by a vampire's. A vampire had drained me...or nearly so, close enough that my heart had been beginning to fail, and Teren had replaced the blood...with his, with his vampire blood. My mouth dropped wide open again. Teren was against turning anyone, and he'd turned me? I couldn't comprehend that. I couldn't believe he'd do that to me? Even dying, I couldn't believe he'd do that to me. We'd never talked about me becoming a vampire, nothing beyond him wishing that I could be like him. But that wasn't possible. It didn't work like that. Did he save me, by killing me?
"What did you do to me?" I asked, stupefied. "Am I...?" I brought a hand to the other side of my neck, trying to find my heartbeat. His eyes tracked my movement as I found my pulse on my skin easily. I could even hear its fast pace in the room. Nope, it was definitely still ticking.
He shook his head. "No, no you're still alive. Your heart is still beating. The babies' hearts are still beating."
Now I shook my head. I was rewarded with a surge of fresh pain as my neck protested the movement. I cringed and my voice came out laced with an edge of that pain. "But...did it not work then? Was your blood just blood after all?" He cringed and looked away. I felt the guilt come back into the room and saw it again, all over his features. "Teren...what did you do? What am I?"
He looked back to me as another tear dripped to his cheek. "I don't know, Emma...I'm so sorry."
Before I could say anything else, Alanna and Halina breezed into the room. They left the door open and I could see the familiar hallway of the Adams family home behind them. He'd brought me back to his home after he'd...replenished me.