He groaned and lifted himself up onto his elbows. Looking down into her eyes, he rolled his h*ps against hers and she sucked in a gulp of air. His body stirred inside her, thickening, hardening. She sighed at the sensation and suddenly she was more than ready for him.
“You touch me and I can’t think,” he admitted, moving again, slowly, pushing deeply into her.
But in a heartbeat he went perfectly still and stared down into her eyes. “Can’t think. Didn’t think. Erica, we didn’t use any protection.”
She gasped, stunned that the thought had never even occurred to her. She’d never done anything so irresponsible in her life.
“I’m sorry. I should have— Damn it.”
“Stop,” she said quickly, reaching up to cup his face with her palm. “It was my mistake as well as yours. But as long as we’re both healthy, it should be all right.”
“I am, I swear,” he said, concern etched on his face. “But are you sure you won’t get—”
“Pregnant?” she finished for him. “I can’t be absolutely positive, of course, but it’s the wrong time of the month, so…”
“Good. That’s good.”
But he didn’t sound relieved, she thought. He sounded almost…sorry.
“But we shouldn’t risk it again.”
“Probably not,” she admitted, “but if you pull out of me now, I’ll have to kill you.”
He grinned, lowered his head and kissed her. “I’ll risk it if you will.”
“Oh, yes,” she said, sliding her hands up and down his back, over his shoulders and down the front of his chest. “Thinking’s overrated anyway.”
“Right,” he murmured, dipping his head for a kiss. “Just feel. Just experience.”
“Experience is good,” she agreed, already feeling the fires burning, building within.
“New experience is even better,” he said and leaned back, wrapping his arms around her, drawing her up with him, keeping their bodies joined. He sat back on his heels, with Erica on his lap.
She gasped and threw her head back, loving the feel of him impaling her so deeply. Instinctively, she twisted her hips, grinding her body against his, increasing the friction between them until he groaned her name and clamped both hands at her hips, holding her still.
In the soft light of the early evening, Erica looked down at him. Cupping his face in her palms, she took a kiss and then one more before sliding her hands down his neck to his shoulders. Then she moved on him, easing herself up and down in a slow, lazy rhythm, driving them both relentlessly onward. His hands at her hips, he kept his gaze locked with hers as she moved, taking him deep, releasing him, only to reclaim him again.
Over and over, as tension built, as need spiraled inside her, she moved, rocking, swaying, twisting her h*ps at their joining. Her hands at his shoulders, she felt it when he neared completion and surrendered to her own cli**x. As the first, electric ripples of pleasure dazzled through her, she heard him shout her name just before he let go and gave himself completely to her.
It was perfect.
What could have been hours passed before Christian said, “Are you cold?”
A chill swept along her spine, but it had nothing to do with the cold. It was his deep whisper resonating in her ear that affected her so. “No. Not cold.”
“Still…” Christian reached across her, grabbed the edge of the blanket and drew it up over her.
Erica snuggled into his side and laid her head on his chest. Running one hand across his warm skin, she tangled her fingers through the soft dark hair until he laughed and the rumble sounded loud in his chest. “Touch me like that and we’re not going to ever go back to the Manor. I’ll have to keep you here all night.”
“Not a very good threat,” she admitted with a smile. “It actually sounds fabulous.” She tipped her face up to look into his eyes. “I don’t think I could ever have enough of you.”
He lifted his head, gave her a quick, hard kiss, then lay back down again, one arm tightening around her, holding her close. “I don’t know what to say to you.”
“Say you don’t regret it.”
“I’d be a damn fool if I did,” he muttered.
She smiled to herself and sighed a little, enjoying the moment. The soft wind rustling through the trees, the grumbling river just a few feet away and the soft summer night close around them. It was all perfect. Her life finally felt…right.
“Not that I’m complaining,” he said, “but how did you know to find me here?”
“Hmm? Oh, Melissa suggested it. She said you came out here a lot on clear nights.”
His hand on her arm stilled and Erica sensed that something had changed, though he hadn’t said a word. Silent tension spilled out between them and though he was still beside her, Erica knew that he was already pulling away. “Christian?”
He scrubbed one hand across his face, released her and sat up to stare out at the river. “Melissa? Melissa knows you were going to come to me?”
“She knows I was looking for you, sure.” Now she was cold. Despite the warmth of the evening air she felt as though ice crystals were settling on her skin. She tugged the edge of the blanket around her and stretched out one hand to touch his back.
He flinched at the contact.
“Great. That’s just great.” He stood up, grabbed his jeans and tugged them on. Then he snatched up her clothes from where they’d fallen and tossed them to her. “Get dressed.”
Hurt and feeling at a complete loss, she only stared at him. “What is wrong with you? Why are you acting like this?”
“Unbelievable.” He muttered something else under his breath, but she couldn’t catch it.
Erica grabbed the clothing he’d tossed her. She slipped her bra on, then tugged her T-shirt on over her head. When she stood up to pull on her panties and skirt, she turned her head to look at him. He was searching for his shirt and finally found it hanging from a tree limb where he must have thrown it earlier.
Disgusted, he snatched it down and Erica was more confused than ever, so she blurted, “What is going on?”
He pulled his shirt on then ran his fingers through his hair. Glaring at her he said, “I told you, I couldn’t be with you. I work for the Jarrod resort. You’re a Jarrod. Word of this gets out, I’ll lose everything. And what do you do? You tell your sister.”
Erica inhaled sharply, feeling as though he’d slapped her. This was what had him so tense? Knowing that she’d spoken to Melissa? Was he really that worried that someone might know they were together? Was his job really that important?
Stung to her soul, she snapped, “Your reputation’s safe, Christian. Melissa didn’t know why I wanted to see you. It’s not like I advertised or printed a pamphlet alerting the residents of Jarrod Ridge that I was going to try to seduce a man who’s been trying to keep me at arm’s length!”
“Damn it, Erica…”
“Relax,” she told him hotly. “You don’t want people to know you were with me? Rest easy then, because I’m in no hurry for anyone to find out about this moment.”
He faced her and though his teeth were gritted, he still managed to say, “It’s not that I don’t want them to know. I can’t let them know.”
“Oh.” She nodded and gave him a wry smile. “Big difference. Thanks for clearing that up.”
“You don’t get it, do you?” He stood, legs far apart, arms folded across his chest as if he were trying to hold himself in place. “I’ve worked my whole damn life for what I’ve got here. I won’t risk it. Won’t lose it. You can’t understand because you’ve always had this…” He threw his arms wide as if taking in all of Jarrod Ridge. “With either the Prentice family or the Jarrods, you’re one of them. I don’t have that. I made my way on my own.”
“And I haven’t?” She snorted in disgust. “You saw my office in San Francisco. Bottom of the food chain. You know why? Because my father never wanted me involved in the Prentice family business. So what I had I made. On my own. And coming here didn’t change that.”
“Erica—”
“No, you had your say. Now it’s my turn. I told you what it was like where I grew up. Never accepted. Never let into the inner circle. It’s only here that I’ve begun to find my way and even then, I wasn’t exactly met by a ticker tape parade.”
He shook his head and sighed. “That’s different. Whether the Jarrods were happy about it or not, you were one of them. You belonged. Like I said, you don’t get it.”
“I’m not one of them. I might be. One day. I hope so. But if that happens it’ll be because I made it happen,” she countered. “I wasn’t handed anything. You think it was easy to come here? It wasn’t. I walked out on the only family I knew. I gave up my job, my home, my life to try for something new. Something better.”
“I’m not going to argue with you,” he told her quietly.
“Of course not,” Erica muttered. “You might lose.”
“I’m doing what I have to do and you’ll never understand it.”
“Oh, I get it,” she said softly. “Finally I get it. You’re a coward.”
He took the two steps separating them and grabbed hold of her upper arms. His hands were strong, each of his fingers digging into her skin as he dragged her up on her toes, so they could be eye to eye. “I’m no coward and you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes, I do,” she said. Erica wasn’t afraid of him. Even with his eyes nearly glowing with fury, he wouldn’t hurt her. It wasn’t in him. He was a closed-up man hiding a passionate nature, but that passion didn’t include brute force. “I can see it in your eyes. You’re already pulling away from me, from what we found, planning on how you can avoid me in the future.”
He let her go instantly and backed up, muttering under his breath. Then he said, “When we’re around others, nothing has to change. We just won’t be doing…this again.”
“Oh, is that all?”
God, how was she breathing? Everything inside her was still and cold. Her lungs, her heart. Even the blood running through her veins felt icy.
Erica grabbed her sandals and hopped on one foot then the other to tug them on. Once she was dressed completely, she threw her hair back from her face and stared daggers at him. “After what we just experienced you can actually stand there and say to me that you don’t want us to be together? That you’ll walk away from this? From what we might have?”
No, Christian thought wildly, he didn’t want to say that. Didn’t want to think it. With Erica, he’d found more peace, more excitement than he’d thought possible. When he held her, she was the world. He couldn’t imagine never having her with him again. Couldn’t even see his life without her in it.
These last few hours had been more precious than anything he’d ever known before. From the moment she’d approached him, it was as if they’d stepped into some dream world where they were the only two beings in existence. He’d forgotten his hard and fast rules. He’d turned his back on what he’d made of himself over the years and lost the essence of who and what he was in her. The magic of her.