Here, in his fantasy world of opulence and fame. Surrounded by his admirers and fellow band mates, successful in their own rights and popular for their role in the band. It seemed almost incredible to picture Gage in the midst of all this, but then, looking at him now, she couldn’t deny that it suited him well.
He didn’t yet have the dissipated look that some rock stars had; his youth was undeniable and he had a great shape still. At age thirty-two, his body was lean like a pro swimmer’s, as well as ripped with manly hardness. He grew his hair much longer than he used to and there was a sleekness to him that she’d never got to see years ago when he was just gorgeous yet slightly scruffy Gage.
Now, the polish one could get only from making several million dollars per show was evident in everything about him. His expensive yet stylishly understated clothes, his mega-star looks and his demeanor reminded her that Forbes had listed him as making twenty five million dollars last year alone.
He was regarding her with a speculative look that put her on her guard. Standing next to him made it easy to forget the other people mingling in the rooms; laughing, chatting and necking. The drummer who Kate knew his name as Chan, an Asian with dyed blue hair had one of the giggly groupies from down in the bar draped around him and they were giggling together like they were high on something. Kate forced herself to meet Gage’s eyes and at once, it was like being sent back in time.
Kate really, really wished Gage wouldn’t look at her like that. The last thing she wanted to do was remember…and regret.
“I always wondered what you’d think of me – that was, if you ever did think of me,” he said wryly. “Now that I’ve achieved all I set out to do, and much more.”
“I was happy for you,” Kate said promptly, sincerely. “There wasn’t a day that I didn’t think you deserved it – all of it. No matter what may have happened or the things I said, I always wished you well, Gage.”
His lips tilted in a crooked smile as he placed his glass on the nearby bar. “I believe you,” he said quietly. “In a way, I owe you some thanks. This all became possible because of you.” He waved his hands expansively.
“What…what do you mean?” Kate asked in a voice hushed with confusion.
“After you left me,” he said with a shrug, his tone bland. “It was like I was lost in a black hole. And during those dark weeks afterwards came my greatest inspiration. I wrote a whole bunch of songs that would later become my best selling debut album.”
Kate felt realization dawn as she remembered that very first album that had gone on to win Gage countless awards for album of the year and song of the year and new artist of the year.
The songs had been gritty and heart-felt, filled with depth and melodic agony. At least, that was what the reviewers had said. She remembered reading an article where Gage had confessed that a personal trauma had got him writing those songs with so much emotions running high in them.
Well, those ‘emotions’ had sat well with the public and Gage’s songs became the top downloaded and sold songs for two years running, breaking the major charts around the world.
“My success story is hinged on you walking out that door, Kate,” Gage said with a mild twist to his smile. “I always promised myself that if I ever saw you again, I’d thank you for being so instrumental to the success you never believed me capable of in my music career.”
Kate wasn’t sure what to say. ‘You’re welcome’ just didn’t seem appropriate, and he’d only made her feel worse, not better, with his confession.
She’d never believed she’d truly hurt him when she’d left. They’d been together barely a year, after all. She’d been so sure he’d forgotten all about her almost the minute she’d walked away. And then, seeing him in all those magazines with a different beauty every time, had shown her that with his fame came the choice that he could have any woman he wanted. No woman would ever think of walking away from Gage Stevens now.
Not when he’d become the groupie king; with girls throwing their underwear at him and flashing their tits at him at concerts. He had a massive following in all the social media. He even had his own “fan base” known as “Gagers” who were the equivalent of the “Beliebers” and “Directioners” of this world. Anytime there was an awards show, or whenever a new single or video of his came out, his “Gagers” always came out full force to give him support and spread the word.
This meant, of course, that Gage was hardly out of the media whether on the web or on TV and print. Anything he did drew a news crew’s presence. Kate began to feel that everywhere she looked; there was something about Gage even up to what he did in his private life. From who he had on his arm at the last red carpet event; to his latest tattoo.
There were even rumors of him getting his very own reality show, and Kate just knew it would be another money spinner for him too.
He had houses in numerous choice parts of the country and the world. Had his own private jet and ultra-fitted tour bus. A single two-hour performance on any major stage earned him more money than Kate could hope to earn in five years. It was staggering to think of. Gage Stevens was a rockstar god. And he used to be hers.
“It was you, Kate,” Gage was saying plainly, his eyes pinned to hers. “No one knows till today the inspiration behind my breakout album. How does it feel knowing you broke my heart and gave me so many demons that drive me and haunt me till this day?”
Kate’s heart was thumping; she felt like it was literally cracking to pieces. The anger, the pain in his eyes was so raw it cut through her like a blade. She believed him. Believed now that he must have truly cared and she had truly hurt him. He didn’t hide the profound torment from his expression and just holding his gaze made everything around them fade out like background pieces. No music, no voices, no presence. Just their long-buried awareness creeping up from the cracks and shrouding them in tempestuous sails.
“Gage, I…”
Kate didn’t get the chance to complete her sentence, as one of the girls swayed up to them and then practically stumbled into Gage, who caught her deftly. The willowy brunette was dressed in a slip of a frock and knee-high black boots with four inch heels. She was holding a half-drunk bottle of whiskey and grinning foolishly up at Gage.
“Hey, sexy. Are you two going to be standing about yakking all night?” the young woman said in a breathy, come-on voice. “I’ve been waiting forever for a piece of your time, Gage. And if your friend insists on staying, then I don’t mind sharing. She’s pretty. I like redheads.” The girl turned and winked at Kate, who exhaled with suppressed annoyance.
“Amanda, not now. This is a reporter from Stardom magazine. We’re trying to hold an interview here.” His voice was gruff and Kate could see his fingers biting into the girl’s slender arms as he held her back from his lips.
“Reporter, huh? Is that what they call it now? I saw the way you two were looking at each other,” Amanda muttered while wagging a clumsy, reprimanding finger in Gage’s face. “I just had to come over here before someone ripped someone else’s clothes off.”
“Amanda…”
“Excuse me,” Kate mumbled, suddenly dumping her glass on the bar and spinning off to find the bathroom.
She didn’t look left or right as she stumbled through the doors to the en suite bathroom. It was no surprise that it was as luxuriously fitted as the rest of the suite. There was a shower enclosure that had the latest spray technology with multiple showerheads above and at the sides of the walls. A huge whirlpool tub still couldn’t dwarf the immense spaciousness of the bathroom. Designer toiletries were arranged in stylish cabinets and all the fittings were well crafted and eye-catching. Kate sank unto the closed toilet seat and covered her face in her hands.
What had made her think she could do this? Treat Gage like a normal stranger when they had a past, though brief, between them? And then just minutes ago, he’d made her believe that though brief, her time with him had impacted him in ways that made their break-up such a traumatic experience for him. She recalled every song in that first album and how Gage had been drawn listeners around the world with his ‘tortured artist’ persona, laying himself bare and singing songs that hearts out there could relate to.
And now he was saying it had been all about her. Or at least, about her leaving him. He’d just made the guilt she’d felt before now ten times worse.
Suddenly realizing she’d spent way too much time holed up in the bathroom, Kate rose from the seat, checked out her reflection, and pinched her pale cheeks. If she could, she’d walk out, right out of the suite and not look back. Walk away from Gage and his rock band pals and his blonde floosy or whoever that chick was that had been crawling all over him back there.
She walked back into the room, only just realizing that the tone of music had changed to one of Gage’s more sonorous songs, filling the suite with strains of string guitars and smoky, restless Gage singing through the speakers.
She stared in amazement at the now empty room. “What happened? Where is everyone?”
“Gone. I made them leave,” Gage said softly, turning form whatever he was fiddling with at the sound system. He viewed her with critical eyes. “Are you okay? Want to start the interview now?”
“I don’t think…”
“It’s late, and we’ve both had a long night,” he said mildly, “So I’ll be cooperative as possible. Ask me whatever you like. Go on, sit down,” he said, indicating an easy chair close to where he sat on the couch opposite.
Drawing in a deep breath, Kate finally made up her mind to see this through. A few questions were required for the two-page feature. In a half hour, tops, she could wrap this up and leave without making a fool of herself and giving in to the urge to lunge in Gage’s direction and simply ravish him with kisses. She could just see herself straddling his thighs as she kissed him, her knees digging into the couch as she ground her panty-covered p**sy over his erection sheathed beneath his pants.
Gathering up every professional bone in her body, Kate finally started the interview. The questions seemed so mundane now that she had him alone, sitting there calmly and also keeping his own level of correctness and formality.
She asked him about a lot of things; about his glamorous lifestyle and whether it was all about play. He told her that yes, it was fun getting to travel around the world, play the best parties and shows, stay in the finest hotels and eat at the top restaurants. Hong Kong tonight, Korea tomorrow…playing to several hundred thousand or to just a thousand people…Different settings brought a different energy.
Sure, Gage confessed, it did feel great but it was also tough. Of course he worked hard, he assured her. Day and night, in the studio, or on the road. And now, doing an interview at ten to one a.m. in the morning. He grinned suddenly at that and Kate couldn’t help smiling back, inwardly glad they could relate without the poison of the past inching into the conversation.