She sighed. The problem with this fascination was that fascination led to feelings, feelings led to love, and love led to misery. She'd endured this sequence before and would give anything to avoid it.
He was right. He wasn't the same lad. The quiet, steady Hugh she'd fallen in love with was gone forever. And she didn't know how to handle this new ruthless, intense man.
He'd warned her that toying with him would be like playing with fire, and her antics in the coach this morning had definitely earned her a nice singe.
She tilted her head to the side and frowned.But then, when have I ever hesitated to play with fire?
Chapter 17~18
Chapter Seventeen
Hugh almost asked himself what he'd done to deserve this torment, but the answer would be too lengthy.
She was running her hands up and down her long, long legs. He suspected she knew he could see, though she was such a sensual person that he'd wager she rubbed her legs as lingeringly when she was alone.
What else did she linger over?
The thought of her running her fingers over her sex...He had to gnash his teeth as his erection stiffened even more. He'd wager anything he owned that she did indeed touch herself like that whenever the need arose. Did she ever think of him? He unfailingly did of her. After Hugh had seen her last night, even his beaten, fatigued body had hungered for her, and he'd taken himself in hand.
She had always been forward-thinking about sexual matters, and he knew she was filled with passion - passion that would need an outlet.
He remembered Bidworth buttoning her blouse. Had Bidworth fulfilled her needs?
Hugh should have killed him.
How long before he could escape this impossible situation?Hurry up, Ethan. Else I'll go mad . Striving to think of other things, distracting things, he paced to the window.
Hugh hadn't wanted to stay here. There were too many people he knew, and one who was privy to exactly what he was - Lysette, Grey's ex-lover. But they wouldn't have reached the next inn until nearly dawn, and once Jane had begun insisting, Hugh had thought he might as well try to extract some information from Lysette about Grey.
Lysette had always been partial to Hugh, and Grey had left her to be with a whore.
Yet the incident in the common room had proved this was a bad idea. Hugh should have had his arm around Jane's shoulders, but he'd been dragging her along to get through the crowds. And Jane had taken one look at Hugh's expression as he fought the urge to deal the drunkard a blow, and she'd known - not precisely what he was, but definitely what he wasn't.
He heard her rise from the water. Bounder that he was, he leaned back. When he caught a glimpse of her, he had to bite back a curse and shuffle his feet to keep his balance. In the space between the panels, he could see her damp back and hissed in a breath at the sight of the spot where her surprisingly generous arse met her long, slim leg.
He closed his eyes briefly, berating himself for looking - even as he imagined striding forward to palm that taut cleft as he ran his mouth down her neck.
He was stunned anew at how shapely she'd become. Her arms and legs were still slender, her torso as well, but her br**sts and arse were plump and seemed to taunt his hands to cup them.Pull her to the bed, cover her wet, slick body with mine, take her furiously -
The maid knocked once more, possibly saving them from disaster, and entered to set out their dinner on the room's dining table. Hugh stayed facing the window since his c**k was stiff as wood. When the girl left, he sat so Jane wouldn't notice. He found the fare was simple, but the wine appeared to be a tolerable vintage.
A few minutes later, Jane emerged from behind the screen, having donned a deep blue dressing gown and wrap. She wore the wrap open enough that he could see the pale tops of her br**sts. When he could drag his gaze away from them, he saw that her shining hair was loose, with damp tendrils curling all about her face. Her flawless skin was pinkened, her eyes bright.
She was elegant and fine, the lines of her face and body so pure. For a moment he just wanted to pretend that he was a lucky bastard who'd somehowtruly landed her as wife. He wanted to pretend he saw her fresh from the bath at his leisure, and dined with her every night before they went to bed together.
Here he was with a woman so lovely she'd make any man conscious of his words and actions, concerned about how she perceived him. She would unnerve most men. And yet she was stillJane .
And when she allowed it, it was so damned easy being around her.
"My wedding night." She sauntered to her seat. "Darling, it isjust as I've always dreamed."
She wasn't going to allow it.
He felt a flare of anger. Everything he was doing was for her benefit. Now, if she would just allow him to do his job unhindered..."My wedding night as well. I'm just as disappointed."
"Disappointed in the circumstance - or your bride?" Never taking her eyes from his, she took a sip of the wine he'd poured, then dabbed her tongue to her bottom lip.
He shifted in his seat. "Any man would be proud to call you wife."
"Then, does this disappointment have anything to do with the fact that you'd sworn never to marry?"
"Partly."
"Partly? So why else...?" She trailed off, eyes widening. "You have a lover, don't you? One you didn't want to forsake? That's it, isn't it? You already have a woman."
"I'm...between," he said, hedging. He had never formed an attachment with another woman - didn't think he'd slept with the same one twice. If he got angry enough at the world, he might drink and take a woman to try to forget, but it just worsened his resentment.
Court had once asked Hugh why he bedded so few.If you felt like I did after, you would no' either. "I just never had any intention of marrying - "
"Never?" she asked in a strange tone.
"It was not in my plans," he said.
She drank deeply. "Between, then, is it? I'll bet you've had a lot of women."
"I'll no' speak of this with you."
"You used to tell me your secrets."
Never the big ones. Though he'd burned to.
Hugh had often considered telling Jane about that terrible and weighty curse, but knew she would scoff. Jane could be irrational, temperamental, unreasonable - but she was never,never fanciful. He could just imagine her smirking and playing along: "Then I must eschew your cursed company, darling, for I quite fancy being alive."
And now, why would he tell her? The closeness they'd shared was gone.
"So, Hugh, what do youtruly do? You're not a businessman. Unless a nefarious import attacked your face?"
He raised his eyebrows at that. She was such a curious female, and one who had an infuriating habit of deducing and then deciding fixedly on her own theories. That could help him now. "Knowing you, you've worked out a theory as to what I am."
She put her hand out, palm up, motioning for him to give her his hand. Before he even had time to think better of it, he'd reached across the table. She captured his hand in hers, then ran the soft pads of her fingers over the calloused, scarred skin of his palm. Such a simple touch, but she made it sensual.
Glancing up, she met his eyes. "I believe you're a mercenary."
She was getting close.
"Is that what you do?" Increasing the pressure, she ran her forefinger down the center of his palm, then back up.
His voice was rough when he asked, "What makes you think that?"
"It make sense. Father said you'd just come from travels with your brother Courtland on the Continent. Court is a known soldier of fortune - we've all heard of him wreaking havoc down there with a band of Highlanders. You must be one of them."
Hughhad been in Andorra riding with his brother's men, but he'd only been there to help Court. They'd fought the Orden de Rechazado - the Order of the Disavowed, a band of fanatical assassins bent on killing Court and Annalía.
"That would be how you cut your face," Jane continued, with a feathery brush over the back of his hand. "And that's how you saved up some money."
Somemoney? Hugh had turned his earnings into wealth with meticulous planning and calculated speculation. He was rich by anyone's standards, with a grand seaside estate in Scotland. Her words sparked another first for Hugh - the unfamiliar need to boast, to impress her. Which was purposeless. "Why do you no' believe I work in your father's business?"
"Hugh, I'm not a complete imbecile." She tapped her finger against the worst scar on the back of his hand. "Look at your hands. And look at how muscular and fit you are. You did not hone a physique like that by working incommerce ."