“I like where this is heading,” he murmured.
“Shush it,” I told him. “I think it’s a great idea.”
“You doing me on top?”
I cocked my head to the side, shooting him a bland look. “No. That’s not what I’m talking about.”
He laughed again, and those green eyes were lighter than I’d seen in days. “I know.”
Bending over, I kissed him lightly. “I’m proud of you.”
His hands settled on my hips. “Why?”
I raised a shoulder. “I just know it’s going to be a hard conversation to have, and I know how much you’ve really been thinking about this. Talking to Calla is a huge step to just letting all of that go.” I kissed him again and then sat up. “Whenever you’re ready to have that conversation, if you want me there, I’m there.”
“I want you there.”
“Then I’m there.”
One hand lifted, threading through my hair. He guided my mouth back to his, stopping just short of our lips meeting. “You know what?”
“What?”
He tugged me down so that when he spoke again his lips brushed mine. “I love you.”
My heart swelled so fast it was no wonder I didn’t lift both of us up to the ceiling. Those three words were words I would never, ever get tired of hearing. I kissed him again, and this time there was nothing soft or chaste about it. I whispered those very same words back to him and then I showed him just how much.
In the middle of the following week, while I was at work organizing Marcus’s schedule through the upcoming summer months, Nick texted about dinner with Calla and Jax the following Sunday.
Going out with them or Reece and Roxy wasn’t something new. We double- and triple-dated often, but I knew Nick had an ulterior motive for this, and I was nervous for him, because I knew this wouldn’t be easy for him. And I really, really hoped that my impression of Calla was correct, that she wasn’t going to hold anything against him.
I took more time than I normally did getting ready Sunday afternoon. Sort of like hopeful primping. I got a mani and pedi with Roxy and Katie in the afternoon, then I tried out one of those green clay masks I’d bought online the previous week. Thankfully, it didn’t stain my skin or do something weird. Then after a long shower, I dried my hair and artfully applied makeup.
“Artfully apply makeup” was code for putting a crap ton of makeup on but somehow managing to look like you weren’t wearing a crap ton of makeup.
Moving on to what to wear, I mulled over the idea of donning a cute spring dress, but it still wasn’t particularly warm, especially in the evenings. So I settled on dark blue skinny jeans, a light sweater, and eyed strappy heels I hadn’t worn yet this year.
I reached up on the top shelf and pulled the shoe box down. A piece of paper drifted free, floating to the floor. Shoving the box under my arm, I bent and picked up the paper.
My breath caught.
I should’ve known what it was once I felt the shiny texture of the paper, but I didn’t remember putting this in the closet. I’d probably done it when I was trying to remove all traces of being pregnant.
My hand trembled slightly as I walked to my bed. Sitting down, I placed the small photo next to me, and I didn’t look at it until I had my shoes on. Then I drew in a deep breath and picked it up.
Honestly, I still didn’t see a baby in the sonogram picture. It was just a black-and-white blob, but it had been my blob and it had been Nick’s blob. Pressing my lips together, I gave a little shake of my head. It didn’t hurt as much as it had before to see this. Confusion still existed. I would never know why it had happened and I wouldn’t know if there was a serious issue with getting pregnant until it happened again, but I knew now there wasn’t anything I could’ve done differently.
And I knew it was okay to still hurt over it.
Standing, I walked over to the shelf and stood the photo up against the one of my dad. It made sense for it to be there. Maybe one day I’d take it down again, store it away. Just like one day Nick would turn his grandfather’s bedroom into something else.
One day.
Nick arrived, looking as yummy as usual in his jeans and button-down shirt. He gave a low whistle when I stepped out in the hall, closing the door behind me.
I gave him a half curtsy. “Thank you.”
He chuckled as he draped his arm over my shoulder. “Weirdo.”
“Whatever.”
We met Jax and Calla at a local steakhouse. They were already there, seated in a booth, because we were late even though we’d left early. Nick got a little . . . frisky in the car outside my apartment and then again outside of the restaurant.
Calla shot me a knowing look as we slid into the booth across from them. Self-conscious, I lifted my hand to my hair, smoothing the waves.
Jax laughed under his breath. “Glad you guys could join us.”
“I know.” Nick picked up his menu, a slight smile on his lips. “You all are blessed by our presence.”
Calla giggled while Jax rolled his eyes. I tucked my hair back as I peeked over at Nick and then turned my attention to her. “So what are you guys getting?”
Her brows puckered as she glanced down at the open menu in front of her. “I think I’m getting the strip.”
“Porterhouse.” Jax patted his flat belly. “Porterhouse all the way.”
Nick tapped a finger off the center of the menu. “They have a rib-eye,” he said to me. “Bone in. You know you want it.”
I grinned. Yeah, I did. The waitress arrived, and once the orders were placed the conversation flowed. I’d ordered a wine, and then Nick made fun of me when I ended up getting a soda, because I couldn’t eat food while drinking water or wine. It was weird and made no sense. I completely knew that.