I feel totally crushed as I get into position, groveling on the floor and clutching a manky old rag. This isn’t what I imagined at all. A girl who looks a bit like April Tremont has sat down on the chair and shoots me an uninterested glance. I guess she’s the stand-in.
“People!” Dino is clapping his hands. “A little background to the scene we’ll be playing. The pirates’ womenfolk are preparing for the marriage ceremony. Gwennie, played by April Tremont—” There’s a burst of applause from some of the extras, and Dino smiles in acknowledgment. “Gwennie is being given to the pirate bandit, Eduardo, played by Curt Millson. However, she’s in love with the rival pirate, Captain Arthur, aka captain of the Black Flag, and in this scene we’ll see this fact being discovered by Eduardo.”
“Hi,” I say miserably to the stand-in. “I have to polish your shoes.”
“Fine.” She lifts up her skirt and I rub her shoe dispiritedly.
“OK, we’re going to rehearse!” comes Dino’s voice. “Action!”
“Marriage to Eduardo,” says the stand-in, in a monotone. “Never while I’m alive.” She takes out a scarf and fondles it. “Oh, Arthur.”
“Background actors,” instructs Dino. “I want you to look at the scarf. You’re interested in it.”
Obediently, I crick my head to look at the scarf, but Dino immediately says, “Not you, cake-eater girl.”
Great. Everyone else gets to look at the scarf while I get to grovel on the floorboards. The door swings open with a creak and I hear the tramp of heavy boots.
“What is that pretty thing?” comes a deep, masculine voice. “Show me.”
“Never!” says the stand-in.
Then there’s some sort of tussle, but I can’t see because I don’t dare lift my head. This is so frustrating. I’m longing to see what it’s all about, but I can’t see a bloody thing, stuck down here. I’ll never get to do my twitch, let alone say, ’Tis true, Cap’n. It’s so depressing.
“Cut!”
I sit back on my heels and wave at Suze, trying not to feel envious. It’s OK for her: She’s on a step, where everyone can see her. She’s even been given a proper prop—an old broken comb—and she’s combing her tangled hair with theatrical flourish.
“Excuse me.” A mellifluous voice hits my ear, and a tiny button boot appears in front of my eyes. I look up and feel a jolt of awe. It’s April Tremont! Herself! She’s stepping into the chair and lifting up her skirts so I can rub at her boots.
“I guess you’re polishing these,” she says with a nod. “Poor you.”
“Oh, it’s fine!” I say at once. “It’s fun. You know. I love polishing boots. I mean, not just on film sets; I love polishing them at home, and in the garden, and … er …”
Argh. Stop babbling, Becky.
“I’m April,” she says pleasantly.
Like I didn’t know that. Like she’s not really, really famous.
“I’m Becky.”
“You’re the one who ate the cake?”
“It was a mistake,” I say hastily.
“That made me laugh.” She smiles, that amazing smile which I’ve seen in loads of movies. Well, not loads of movies exactly. Two movies and one sitcom and an ad campaign for moisturizer. But still.
“April. Curt. A word with you both?” Ant is heading over this way, and I hurriedly bury my face in April’s skirt so he won’t notice me. Not that he seems to notice any of the extras anyway.
“I want some real violence in this scene,” I hear him saying above my head. “Curt, when you see the insignia of your enemy on Gwennie’s scarf, everything changes. You know she’s in love with Arthur, and it infuriates you. Remember, this scene is the pivot; it’s what drives you to attack the Fleet of Foes; it’s what starts the whole chain of events. OK, guys? Passion. Intensity. Let’s go for a take.”
Despite everything, I can’t help feeling a jolt of excitement. A take! We’re going for a take! It’s happening!
An hour later, I’m feeling a teeny bit less excited. We’ve done the scene over and over, and every time I have to keep my head down while all the action goes on above, and I’m getting achy knees from being in this position.
Plus, the more we do the scene, the less I understand it.
“Are you OK?” April Tremont smiles down from where she’s having her makeup touched up. “Pretty tough down there.”
“Oh, it’s fine!” I say at once. “Fine! Really fab!”
“Enjoying the scene?”
“Er …” I hesitate. I know I should say, Yes, it’s brilliant! But the truth is, I just can’t relate to it.
“I don’t get it,” I say at last. “But you’re really good,” I add quickly.
“Which part don’t you get?” says April, looking interested.
“Well, why are you playing with your scarf?”
“It’s a memento from my lover, Arthur,” explains April. “It has his distinctive insignia on it. See?” She holds the scarf out so I can see.
“I know that.” I nod. “But you’re on Eduardo’s ship. He’s really violent and he hates Arthur. So wouldn’t you keep it hidden? If you really loved Arthur you’d protect him, surely.”
April Tremont stares at me silently for a few moments. “That’s a good point,” she says. “Why am I playing with it?”