The big deal was that Garrett didn’t want to see her right now. The woman beside him caressed his arm, and Garrett tensed. He smiled at her—he didn’t want to be rude, after all—and said, “Look, you seem very nice, but—”
“Hi,” Kiersten said, looking first at the woman beside Garrett, and then following her arm to where she rubbed Garrett’s shoulder. Her jaw flexed, but otherwise she looked as if she hadn’t a care in the world. “Am I interrupting something?”
“No,” Garrett assured her, rising to his feet. “Come on, let’s go grab a table.”
Kiersten cast another glance at the stranger, not budging from where she stood. “Are you sure? I don’t want to ruin your night or anything.”
“Absolutely positive,” Garrett snapped, his heart wrenching at the lack of concern on Kiersten’s face at the thought of him picking up another woman.
Obviously he had been right to doubt her when she said she wanted him. If she did, she wouldn’t be practically pushing him at this other woman. She didn’t give a damn.
“Stay and talk to your friend.” Kiersten tilted her chin up. “We’ll go in without you.”
He clenched his jaw. That’s it. He was done. “I said I don’t want to stay and talk. I’m hungry.”
“Yeah. Let’s go,” Mike added, grabbing his sister’s hand. He shot Garrett a cautious look and tugged on Kiersten’s hand. She still didn’t move. “Come on.”
Kiersten leaned closer to Garrett. “Who am I to stop you? It’s obviously what you’ve been doing every night. At least now I know.”
“You don’t know a damn thing.” Garrett gritted his teeth. “And if I wanted to talk to her, I would. Knock it off.”
“I’m just saying…” She broke off and looked away from him, her shoulders tense. “Whatever. It doesn’t matter.”
“I know what you’re saying. I got the message loud and clear,” Garrett managed to get out from his aching throat. If she said it any clearer, the whole room would hear his heart shatter into a million pieces. “And you’re right. It doesn’t matter at all, does it?”
She glanced at him in surprise. Maybe he hadn’t hid his pain well enough this time. “Garrett—”
He shook his head. He didn’t want apologies or pity. He was the idiot who just couldn’t stop caring. “You know what? You two go ahead and eat. I’m going to go home. Hit the rack early.”
Without another word, he left the restaurant. He repeated the same words he’d been saying over and over and over again ever since he left her bed the other night.
She doesn’t love me. Never will.
Maybe if he said it enough times, he would actually move on. And maybe if he escaped her company for more than five f**king minutes at a time, he’d be able to get her out of his mind—and out of his heart.
Chapter Twelve
“That was messed up,” Mike said, his voice rough. “Shit, even I could see how much you hurt him.”
Kiersten blinked back tears, wanting to stay angry but failing horribly. She’d done it again. Gone all psycho pregnant woman on his ass. “He was the one flirting with her. He’s probably been doing it every night while I sat at home and waited for him.”
Mike sighed and led her to their table. Once they sat down, he leveled a look at her. “He hasn’t been hitting on anyone. He hasn’t been with another woman. He’s been with me, trying to hide how upset he is.”
Kiersten picked up her napkin and balled it in her hands. “And what? That’s somehow my fault?”
“Uh.” He shot her a look that said he clearly questioned her state of mind. “Yeah. It is. Are you that blind?”
She collapsed back against the chair. “Maybe.”
“He’s going to be the father of your child, and you keep pushing him away.” He rubbed his forehead. “The question is: Do you really want him to leave you? Because you’re going to get it if you continue on this way. He’s trying to be there for you but you won’t let him.”
He was right. Once again, she’d screwed up. “I came here to show him how I felt.”
“How you felt?” He snorted. “If what you wanted him to see was that you wanted him to f**k that woman, then great job. He saw that, all right.”
Kiersten bit her lip. “No. I don’t want that.”
“Well? What do you want?”
She lifted a shoulder. “Chris wants us to be a couple. So do you and Brianna. Garrett used to want that, too.”
“Fuck them. And f**k me.” He leaned in. “What do you want, Kiersten? Not your hairdresser or your mailman or Jesus f**king Christ. You.”
“I…I want him to be with me.”
He exhaled. “Then you have a hell of a way of showing it. Do you love him?”
“Love is such a generic word.”
“Bullshit.” He pointed a finger at her nose. “Do. You. Love. Him?”
Did she? When it came down to it, that’s all that mattered. And…she did. She loved him. It hadn’t been like this with Pete. With Pete, she’d practically gotten slammed over the head by their whirlwind romance. There had been no doubt in her mind she loved him.
But with Garrett, it had been a slow building love that snuck up on her. One that came from years of friendship and trust and loyalty. One she could believe in. A healthy, happy love that made her heart warm and her life happier. And how had she treated him?
She’d treated him exactly the way she had been scared he would treat her. She had hurt him, pushed him away, and refused to trust him. To believe in him. And she had done it without a second thought. She was what she didn’t ever want to have in her life again.
She was her own worst enemy.
She dropped her face in her hands and took a shuddering breath. “I do. I love him. But what if he doesn’t love me back? What if it’s too late? I ruined everything. Treated him horribly.”
“He does love you.” Mike picked up his menu. “Trust me. He’s been moping all week. He’s got all the trademarks of love. Sad eyes. Unhappy love life. No sex.” He lifted his glass to her. “If that’s not love, then I don’t know what is.”
“Gee. Sounds wonderful,” she said dryly. “Can’t wait to get me some of that.”
“It is what it is.” He shrugged. “I might not be an expert but I’ll give you a small tidbit of advice. If you love someone, don’t tell them to flirt with another woman. And don’t ignore him when he says he doesn’t want to. And most of all? Don’t push him away.”