I stopped moving.
“All will be well,” she lied.
I nodded and assured her of the only thing I could assure her of in that moment, or at least all she would allow.
“I shall begin with Circe and Lahn. I’ll keep you apprised.”
She dipped her chin. “Thank you.”
Before I could utter another word, without a glance back, she swept from the room.
I stood staring at the empty doorway for some time, my heart heavy for my friend, feeling some frustration her pride forced her to block the efforts of help of those who cared about her.
And it was not lost on me that perhaps, in the past, those who cared about me felt the same with my prideful ways.
If this was the case, it was good that Noc had delivered me of that on our first night of normal, for now I knew the pain of having pain without allowing oneself to seek solace was much akin to the pain of caring about someone who refused solace offered.
I heaved a sigh and moved back to my crystal ball, fluttering a hand over it to clear the blue smoke that drifted through it and called up the this-world Lahn.
When I did, regardless of how often I’d observed him, I found myself surprised at just how easy he was to observe.
Unlike losing my concentration earlier in attempting to understand the life of the this-world Frey, I got quite lost in watching the this-word Lahn.
So much so I jumped when I heard Noc’s voice saying, “Ready to go find a house, sugarlips?”
I looked to the door to see him sauntering through.
Therefore I smiled and rose again from my seat.
He walked right to me, smiling back, rounding me with an arm and dipping his head to mine to drop a closed-mouth kiss on my lips.
After delivering me that morning from his home so I could have breakfast with Josette and he could leave to give her and I time to spend together, as planned, he’d returned to take us, what he referred to as, “house hunting.”
We’d been apart perhaps three hours.
I’d missed him.
“I’m ready, darling,” I answered.
His arm around me gave me a squeeze and I could feel him preparing to let me go but I lifted a hand to his chest to forestall him.
“Before we go, you must know I have news,” I shared.
“And that would be?”
Standing close together, I told him all I’d learned.
His joy at Finnie and Frey, Lahn and Circe and Apollo and Maddie’s news was unhidden, this one of the many things I loved about him.
There was no subterfuge with Noc. He did not feel it made him more of a man to hide his emotions. It was a thing of beauty, a gift he bestowed on anyone who was fortunate enough to witness it, and I treasured it for just that.
But when I told him of the Frey and Sjofn of this world, he burst out laughing.
When his mirth settled to chuckles, he said, “Well, that takes care of that.”
“Although I do believe I can put it together, can you explain what a sperm bank is?”
He grinned and explained.
When he did, it was I who burst out laughing.
When my mirth had settled to chuckles, I wondered if I looked upon him with the warmth that he was right then looking at me after he did the same.
I hoped so.
“This world has many conveniences,” I observed. “Many.”
“Yeah,” Noc agreed through a grin. “Now, after we look at places, we’ll go to the mall again. Get baby presents. See if we can wrangle five minutes with Valentine so she’ll deliver them.”
“What a lovely idea,” I murmured, not at all surprised that Noc had had it.
I had not shared with him about Valentine except to tell him I’d seen her and she’d given me the news I’d imparted on Noc.
I wouldn’t either, unless he asked about it.
That wasn’t what sisters did.
And I finally had sisters. I needed to take care of them.
And this, however I needed to do, specifically with Valentine, I would do.
* * * * *
“This is revolting,” I said under my breath to Noc.
“This is suburbia, Frannie,” he replied under his breath to me. “You told the agent you wanted greenspace, you aren’t gonna find much of that in a city.”
I tore my gaze from the personality-less room of what had been referred to as a “model home,” though my understanding of the word “model” did not reconcile with anything to do with the home we were in, and looked to Josette.
She felt my regard, turned to me and curled her lip.
I looked to the agent who was pretending she wasn’t trying to listen and stated, “I’m sorry for taking you so far away from the city to show us this property, but I’m afraid it won’t do.”
She forced a smile and moved my way, saying, “Well, now we’ve seen four properties so perhaps you can share what you liked, and didn’t, about each and maybe I can narrow my search.”
What I liked was Noc’s home and not because I wished that for Josette and me.
I liked it because there was great beauty in having all that was Noc surrounding me, making me feel safe and warm and peaceful, none of which I’d ever had. I loved being in his home in a way I knew that could be my home, far less grand than any I’d ever known, but indisputably far better as well.
But I couldn’t request from Noc that he allow Josette and me to live with him.
Firstly because it was far too small. For Noc and I to have what I wished Noc and I to have when we had our alone times, Josette obviously could not be with us.
Secondly, because this was an intimacy I felt—for some unfathomable reason I still understood as accurate—was one Noc needed to invite.