“Knock, knock.” Seth’s voice, although he’s attempting to be quiet, carries throughout the house.
“Well, hello, beautiful,” I hear him say.
“Motherfucker!” I stomp off to the living room. Are all four of my fucking horn-dog friends going to hit on her?
“You’ve been holding out on us,” Kent says, his eyes glued to Kendall.
“Kitchen. Now,” I demand.
Five sets of eyes—four large one small—stare back at me. I give my friends the look, the one that says ‘do that shit now.’ Once they’ve left the living room, I walk over to Kendall, sitting on the end of the couch.
“How you two doing?” I ask her. “You want me to take him?”
“No. I mean, not unless you have to. I love holding him. I don’t usually get to snuggle them at work, and this little guy is great at snuggling.” She lifts him so her lips meet his little cheek.
I should be thinking about germs, about how this girl who I’ve seen less than a handful of times since high school is loving on my son. Instead, I’m thinking about how lucky my little man is to get to feel her soft lips against his skin.
I’m truly fucked! I need sleep or a night out or something. This is not me. I’ve lost my damn mind!
“No, you’re good. I just don’t want to take advantage. You’re my guest, after all.” I reach out and tuck a loose curl behind her ear. Her hair feels like silk.
“No, you’re not, I like holding him, if that’s okay.”
“Yeah, sweet girl. That’s more than okay.”
“So, what are we watching?” Tyler asks.
He’s leading the pack into the living room. Fuck, I forgot that I need to warn them all away from Kendall.
I toss the remote to Tyler and settle in next to Kendall. I can use the excuse that she has Knox. At least that’s what I’m telling myself—and them—if they ask.
“I think the ladies should pick,” Reagan chimes in.
“I agree,” Dawn adds.
Tyler smirks. “What about you, Kendall?”
She looks up at him then down to Knox. “I’m good with whatever.”
“You’re hogging my nephew’s cuddles.” Reagan mock-glares at her.
“Hey, you left me here, that’s your own fault. I’m not giving him up until Daddy says it’s bedtime.”
“He’s hard to resist,” Reagan says. “Come on, ladies first and all that,” she says to Tyler.
He takes the seat next to her on the loveseat and pats her head, handing her the remote.
Seth and Kent sit on the floor, kicked back against the chair they both insisted Dawn sit in. That leaves Mark to take the seat beside me. I visibly relax knowing they won’t be next to Kendall. Irrational, I know, but fuck if I can make it stop.
Baby Knox is sleeping soundly in my arms. Every once in a while, his little lip sticks out, and it’s the most adorable thing ever. I try to keep my attention on him and the movie, but I’m not really sure what’s going on. I may be looking at the screen, but really I’m just thinking about Ridge. About how close he’s sitting to me. How his thigh rubs against mine. How incredible he smells. How, for the first time in months, my body is reacting to a man. I thought Cal had ruined me, broke my desire to ever want to go down the path of dating ever again.
“You’re good with him,” Ridge says, just low enough so only I can hear.
I’m lusting after him, and I’m hit with a feeling of guilt. He just lost his . . . Girlfriend? Wife? Fiancée? And here I am thinking inappropriate thoughts about how it feels to sit close to him. He’s feeling out how to live without her, how to raise his son without her.
There is something seriously wrong with me.
“He’s such a good baby.”
“That’s what they tell me, but I have nothing to gauge it on.” He chuckles. “To me, he is. He hardly ever cries. He was fussy today, but it was like he just wasn’t feeling it, you know?”
I nod. We all have those days, even babies.
“I’m proud of you, brother,” Reagan says.
Apparently, we weren’t talking as softly as we thought.
“You know him so well already. You’re a good dad, Ridge,” she says, a sad smile on her lips.
“You going to hog him all night? Can I take a turn?” Mark asks me. I look to Ridge for permission. Not that he would care that his friends are holding his kid, but it’s not my place. Besides, I did vow to not give him up until bedtime. I was just messing with Reagan, but I wouldn’t complain.
He nods. “Don’t corrupt my son, Marcus.” He grins.
Slowly, I slide to the edge of the couch and stand. I feel Ridge’s hand on the small of my back, helping steady me. I don’t look at him, afraid he’ll see that as each second ticks by, I grow more attracted to him. Instead, I stop in front of Mark, lean down, and transfer Knox into his arms. I return to my seat next to Ridge, my body even more aware of him now that I don’t have a baby to cuddle, to distract me.
I focus on the movie and try like hell to block out the feeling of his thigh against mine.
The night carries on, and we eat, watch movies, and even play Battle of the Sexes. The guys all take their turns holding Knox, and let me tell you, it’s a sight. There is nothing like the image of a man loving on a tiny baby. It makes you have all kinds of thoughts. From all the warm tingling to ‘I want to have your babies, let’s start practicing.’ From what I could tell, Dawn and Reagan were just as affected as I was. Although, Reagan seems to keep her attention on Tyler most of the time. I need to ask her about that later.