“When did they stop?”
“Two years ago, when I started dating Kyle, and when he threatened to report them—but I stopped him. It’s not that I don’t want to see them to pay for what they’ve done to me—but life has a way of catching up on us—and I don’t want to live with so much hate in me. Hate ruins people and I didn’t want to lose perspective of what I want my life to be like.”
“I’ve forgiven them—but forgetting it is another matter. I still get nightmares from time to time—but I won’t let them win—I just won’t—I’m stronger than that.”
He sat behind me and hugged me from behind as he whispered softly, “I’m so sorry—I knew you hid something —but never once it occurred to me that you were an abuse victim—people who do that to helpless children are sick twisted human beings. I feel wretched—I want to ease your pain—but I don’t know how—,” his heart was beating erratically on my back. He’s angry. His breathing and his told me so.
“Just be here—I don’t want to talk about it anymore—it’s in the past, let’s leave it here,” twisting my head to study his face. Leaning, I kissed him with all the emotions that rolling off me.
There’s only a few people who knew about my past—Kyle, Chad, and Lucy. Sharing this part of me with Blake is huge. But I needed him to understand when the time comes and I fall short from his expectations. Trust is important—and I trusted him as my friend—but as boyfriend/lover—we’re still working on that. I may not offer my heart—but I can offer him everything else.
“Just promise me one thing,” I said against his lips.
“I’ll give you anything, poppet”
“No matter what happens—just be honest—promise me that, Blake?”
His thumb on my chin lifting it to meet his silver midnight blue eyes, all sorts of emotions going through them, I was dumbstruck. The gold flecks stood out and the effect was spell-binding, I was irrevocably ensnared with his enigmatic man. “I promise that I will always be honest and never lie to you. From now on—I will protect you as my own—you’re mine now, no harm will come to you.”
My entire body swelled from his protective and possessive nature—he’s a Knightly—it come with the territory, I suppose.
Resting my head on the expanse his chest, I pondered our conversation. “I had a wonderful childhood,” he spoke softly, “my parents—they were so in love with each other—they both never failed to tell me or show me how much I was loved. When I saw how other parents treated their children, I felt blessed that mine were wonderful. When they died, I was angry because they left me, but at the same time I was grateful that they were taken together. I don’t know how one could survive without the other.”
“Grandfather taught me to have a backbone. To be strong and master my emotions—he once said that once your emotions gets the best of you—your rational and logical thoughts erode, a man can be easily conquered—easily defeated and the valuable idea of focus evaporates.
He wasn’t easy to live with at first and I rebelled. I was angry at everyone, but what I hadn’t realized that he was hurting as well. He lost his son too—and we were both grieving. We reached a compromise and his constant encouragement and reminder of my parents held me in check. And for that, am grateful that he never gave up on me. Grandfather’s the only one I have left—I swore to myself that I will never disappointment him from then on.”
He paused and stoked my hair, “Sienna—I’ve never done this before.” I looked up, “what? Having someone on your bed?” he smiled and pinched my cheek, “no, you beautiful wrench, a proper relationship—what I had was a mutual agreement with both consenting adults—exclusive sex with no strings attached. But this—this is different. I need you to be patient— this is all new to me. I’ll make mistakes—I assure you but don’t condemn me without talking to me first. It’s all I ask—”
“Thank you for telling me, Blake. You don’t know much it makes me happy to hear you say that. I promise—I’ll be patient with you.”
Leaving loud smacking kisses all over my face as I giggled like a little girl who got her wish from Santa. “I can die happy now—I’ve waited so long. And now, here you are—” kissing my neck and my earlobe, “driving me mad with hunger. You’re this burning need in my blood Sienna and I’m ravenous”
Rolling me on my back, he quickly demolished my lips.
The only thing that’s running through my mind is “mine, he’s mine” as he annihilated my body with voracious greed, quenching his thirsty body.
His touch was rough and raw—but the thrill of having him again consumed my very being. When he finally rammed his c**k inside with full force, I welcomed it lasciviously.
His lovemaking was demanding, hard and harsh like a man starved—I matched his need.
No words were spoken, our body spoke for us.
Never in my wildest dreams had I imagined this soul-consuming connection with anyone. A connection of souls that obliterated your sanity and yearning with no concession. Like a hypnotic state of nonsensical merry-go-round of emotions with no chance in hell of slowing down. People always spoke about it, but I never understood their uncontrollable obsession, until now.
I’m petrified and scared shitless, but I don’t have the capacity to walk away from him.
It’s all or nothing.
Twenty-three
“Poppet, wake up,” his voice trailing on my neck as it sent goose bumps all over my body.
I sighed contently, I like being woken up to this. I was on my stomach and his kisses trailed lower.
Jesus, the man has more stamina compared to an Arabian horse.
I was caught by surprise when he swiftly lifted my butt and placed a pillow underneath. My ass was protruding in the air—hailing for his undivided attention. His thumb intensely rubbed my clit as he licked the lips and stuck his tongue inside my opening. He groaned loudly when I moaned his named.
If this is his way of marking me his, then mark away lover!
He’s insatiable and I love the fact that he couldn’t get enough of me.
Lifting his body, on his knees, he squeezed both of his hands on my ass. He took his sweet time, torturing me with the head of his cock, swiping it back and forth on my clit, making sure I was wet enough.