"I don't know. Maybe I watched that show a long time ago?"
"It wasn't a TV show," Julia said, her fingers curling back under her hand in retreat, her breath heavy. "That was a school play."
"A play?" Damien said helplessly.
"Coyotes. We all played coyotes. Tristan was one of the coyotes along with me. You knew his name. How? I never told you his name."
"Julia—"
"I never told you his name!" Her voice was frantic, now, her thoughts more so.
... Lied, he lied to me. Liar. LIAR! ...
"Julia, I'm sorry." Damien grasped her arms, trying to soothe her.
"Don't—don't!" Julia slid backwards, off of the bed. Damien lifted his leg to get out of bed before a shooting pain reminded him that it was broken.
Lied. Liar. He knows. He knows everything.
"Julia, let me explain."
Liar. Out. Have to get out.
"I don't want to be here," Julia said. "I don't ... I don't want to be around you right now." Her footsteps slipped backward, toward the door. He reached his hand out helplessly.
"Please don't—"
LIAR.
"I can't, Damien!" Julia's voice choked on the words. "I just ... I can't."
Betrayed. Liar. Knows. Out.
Damien listened to her steps as she flew down the stairs. The door slammed shut behind her and her presence faded from his senses. He leaned his head back against the pillow. Hurt and anger pulsed through his veins as intensely as if he had felt the emotions himself. He was a fool. She wouldn't want to talk to him again, and who could blame her?
The pain was too much, and Damien's hand scrambled for the pills Jordan had left for him on the side table. He gulped them down and waited until the blood stopped pounding in his ears. Julia had left, and he was alone now, so alone that he could not sense any edges of the reality around him. He did not want to.
The pills worked quickly, and the dark edges of the world blurred and enveloped him. He slipped into the emptiness gratefully.
CHAPTER NINE
Julia
Julia left the house in a fury. Having him know every nuance of her emotion was bad enough, but he'd been reading her thoughts without telling her! Hot tears welled up behind her eyes as she stormed down the porch steps and across the lawn. She didn't know where she was going, only that she had to get out.
The sun did not reach through in the thickest parts of the forest, and Julia ended up on a small trail that led down to where the dense firs branched over a stream. Balancing precariously, she clambered up the side of a boulder and sat down. The boulder overlooked the water, and Julia closed her eyes, letting the rest of her senses feel the forest as Damien would feel it. The soft bubbling of water over stones. The birds calling from one tree to another; a woodpecker at work not far off in the distance. A rustling of leaves, the slow creak of branches moved by the invisible wind overhead.
"Are you following me too?"
Julia snapped her head around and saw Mara standing just a few feet downstream, her arms crossed.
"What—where is ... " Julia looked around. Someone should be here.
"Jordan is just over the hill by his shelter, don't worry," Mara said. "Everybody's got their eye on me."
"That's not why I came here," Julia said. "Sorry, I didn't even know this was where you were."
"Why, then?" Mara cocked her head curiously. Julia didn't know how to respond, but when she didn't say anything Mara leapt up nimbly onto the rock next to her.
"I'd rather not talk about it," Julia said.
"If you're going to blame me for all of this—"
"I'm not," Julia said. "This isn't about you."
"Oh. Okay," Mara said. She sat in silence for a moment. A leaf drifted by in the stream, bobbing around the stones. Julia watched it go until it disappeared downstream.
"I'm sorry about what happened with Damien," Mara said.
Julia looked over in surprise. Mara's arms were wrapped around her knees protectively. Her previously snarky disposition seemed disarmed by Julia's obvious distress, but she was still wary.
"How did it happen?" Julia asked, being careful not to let any blame come into her voice.
"I—I thought it was Kyle following me. I led him through some tricks, to see if his tracking was as good as he said it was. He's kind of a brag."
"That's putting it mildly," Julia said. "What tricks?"
"Basic stuff." Mara shook her hair behind her shoulders. "Crossing streams, backtracking, that kind of thing. I was about to say forget it and go home—I thought Kyle had given up trying to track me. But I guess Damien was out looking for me too."
"He found you?" Julia asked, her heart beating faster.
"Yeah, and I had a great place hidden right outside of the territory. He came looking for me and I—you know, I jumped at him. I wanted to see if he could fight, even though he was blind.
"And?" Julia's mouth was dry, her muscles tense as though she was there, fighting alongside Damien.
"And he rolled me off but then backed up, like we were fighting for real. And then his back legs slipped off of the edge ... "
Mara stopped and looked up at Julia. Julia was surprised to see tears in her eyes.
"It wasn't intentional. I promise. I would never—I thought it was just for fun."
"I believe you," Julia said. She reached out and pressed her hand on top of Mara's. To her surprise, Mara took her hand and squeezed it—lightly, but Julia could still feel the strength behind her grasp. Then Mara pulled back into her shell.
"Katherine doesn't believe me. None of them do."
"They will."
They sat on the rock and thought. In Julia's mind, the scene played out in her head: Damien, backing up, not knowing the cliff was right behind him ... She shuddered.
"I'm sorry," Mara said again.
"It's okay," Julia said. "Really. It was a mistake, that's all."
"I don't fit in here," Mara said, looking back toward the stream. Her hands turned a dried twig over between her fingers, the dry leaves crackling as she pinched them off one by one.
"What do you mean?"
"This pack. It's not at all like it was back with Trax."
"What was it like there?"
"Don't get me wrong." Mara smiled, looking back up at Julia. "It's good to be out of there. But I knew my place, and it was easy to understand the pack rules. At least there, I knew to shut up and follow orders. Here, I feel like I'm just doing everything wrong, making one mistake after another." She snapped the twig in between her fingers.
"Hey, at least you can shift. I'm the worst pack member ever."
Mara laughed and tossed the broken twig into the river. It bobbed once and then disappeared under the surface, pulled down by the current. When Mara spoke again, her voice was low and tense and her eyes sparked with a fierce intensity.
"Do you want to go back to her?"
"Who?" Julia asked, but she had already figured out what Mara was going to say.
"The werewitch. I could lead you there, you know."
"I know," Julia said softly. The sparks in Mara's eyes twinkled as she looked at Julia.
"We could figure out how to fix you. So that you could shift."
A chill ran through Julia, making goosebumps rise on her skin.
"Yes," she said. "I would like that."
CHAPTER TEN
Damien
Damien lay in bed. The leg had not broken cleanly, and he was unable to get up without the pain making him yelp.
"It'll be another week or so before you can walk on it," Jordan said. "This wouldn't be so bad if you hadn't been shifting so much between wolf and human form while I was trying to fix you."
"I was barely conscious," Damien said.
"And you still managed to be a nuisance. I'd set up a splint for a human leg and turn my back for two seconds, then I'm back and it's a wolf leg I'm setting, all messed up."
"So I can't walk? Can I walk with crutches?"
"A wheelchair, maybe," Jordan said. Julia came into the room. "Or Julia could carry you around everywhere on her back."
"I don't want to know what you two are plotting about." Julia said. "But I'm not carrying anyone."
"I'm not rolling around in a wheelchair," Damien said. "I'll wait until my leg heals. A week?"
"I know you'll want to get up before then, but no," Jordan said. "A week. Minimum. This wasn't a nice little break you can get up and walk away from."
Damien sighed and turned to Julia. "Your classes haven't started yet, right? How are your carrying muscles?"
"About that. I need to talk with you."
Alone.
Damien blinked at the thought that came strongly from her. He turned to Jordan.
"Anything else you need from me, Doc?"
"Nope, and I've got to get back to work on my shelter," Jordan said, getting the hint. He packed up his medical bag and left the room.
"You need to talk with me about classes?" he asked, knowing that wasn't it.
"I only have five days before the beginning of the semester," Julia said.
"And?"
"And I want to go back."
"Back where?" he asked.
"You know where," Julia said sharply. "You've been listening to my thoughts, you ought to know all about what I'm going to do."
"I don't hear everything," Damien said. "And most of the time I shutter it all out. It's just that one time—"
"Just that one time when you slipped up." Julia said. "And all the other times when you didn't."
"I'm sorry. I am."
"It's not about being sorry," Julia said. "I ... I can't be in a relationship that's so unequal."
"What can I do?" Damien asked. Her thoughts broke through into his mind and made his blood run cold: Let me go.
Damien found that he could not breathe. She wanted to leave. Leave him? Forever?
"Julia—"
"I want to go back to Trax's territory," Julia said. "To find the werewitch who did this to me. You said I could go."
A rush of relief flooded through Damien. She wasn't going to leave him.
"I said we could go. And right now—" He motioned down to his injured leg.
No.
"I don't have much time before school starts," Julia said. "And I can't stay here, living with you like this. With you able to read me."
Not fair. Liar. Betrayed ...
Damien bit down hard on his lip. The rush of sadness and anger from Julia, the blame that overwhelmed him, made it hard for him to think.
"Julia, let's wait until my leg is healed and I can come with you."
NO.
"No." Julia's voice was as hard as her mind. "I'm going this week, without you."
"Then why are you telling me this?" Damien asked.
"Because," Julia said, "I want to bring Mara."
Damien cast about in his mind for the right thing to say. He knew Julia was expecting him to argue against it, and his first instinct was definitely to forbid her to go. The territory was dangerous. And Julia was unprotected. If wolves attacked her—hell, if any predator out there attacked her, she would be unable to defend herself.