Her meds?
“I can’t give them to you,” Sydney said, running her hand down Andrea’s back.
Andrea’s cries grew stronger, and I couldn’t stop myself. I moved closer, kneeling down.
“I’m sorry, Andrea. I can’t,” Sydney continued, holding Andrea tight. “You’ve been drinking. I can’t give you those pills. Not when you’ve been drinking.”
“I can’t breathe,” shrieked Andrea.
“I’m going to get you to breathe again, okay? Just listen to me. I’m going to get you to breathe again.” Sydney paused, looking over at me. “You need to leave.”
Fuck that. “Is she okay?”
“She will be,” she replied softly. “But please leave. She’s not going to get better with you in here.”
I didn’t understand that, but as I glanced at Andrea, my heart fucking shattered a bit. She was practically curled into a ball.
“I’ll make sure she’s okay.” Sydney met my gaze. “But please leave. Let me take care of her.”
But I wanted to be the one to take care of her. After all, I had a feeling that I’d caused this—or at least added to whatever the hell was going on. Never did I suspect my ignorant words would have driven her to this, and maybe it was partly due to the alcohol, but I was a part of this.
“She has panic attacks,” Sydney said when I hadn’t moved. “That’s all this is, okay? It’s a panic attack.”
Panic attack? My internal thoughts were a parrot. I had no idea. Never once had Andrea mentioned anything like that or even appeared like she suffered from them. Obviously it was something relatively common if Sydney knew about them and Andrea had meds—meds she couldn’t take because she’d been drinking.
Oh man, I knew what alcohol could do if mixed with certain meds. I didn’t know what kind of meds she was supposed to take in this situation, but what if she had gotten up here and taken them? Good God, it could’ve ended in a tragic disaster.
I found myself nodding as I slowly rose and I wasn’t even aware that I was out in the hall until I spotted Kyler waiting by the steps. I walked past him. “I didn’t know,” I said. “I didn’t know she went through that.”
Kyler said nothing as he followed me downstairs. I didn’t know where I was going, but I needed to keep moving. I hit the kitchen and stopped, running both hands over my head. “Did you know?” I asked when I heard Kyler behind me.
There was a pause. “Syd mentioned it before.”
“Shit.” I dropped my hands. Tension crept across my neck. “And no one thought it would be a good idea to tell me?”
“Why would we? I mean, that’s some personal shit right there.”
I faced him. “Sydney told you.”
“I’m her boyfriend, and it wasn’t like I was going to tell people. And you—not to be ignorant—but you’re just some guy who hangs out with Andrea every once in a while.”
My hands closed into fists. “I’m not some random fucking dude.”
He arched a brow. “You’re not?”
“Fuck no.”
“You’re her friend then?”
“I’d say we fall in the ‘more than just friends’ category,” I responded and turned away. Spying the beer bottle on the counter, I snatched it up and walked over to the sink, emptying the fucker out. “What? You’re not going to ask for details on that statement?”
“I really don’t think this is the time for me to get info out of you,” he replied calmly. “All things considered.”
“Hell.” I threw the empty bottle in the trash and then gripped the edge of the counter. My head dipped. “I’m a dick. A total fucking dick.”
I shouldn’t have said what I did. There was something to be said about being too honest and those words had been too honest. They were also hurtful as fuck. Anger and frustration had gotten the better of me, and that really made me no different than my father.
Knowing that burned like a mother.
How many times had my father lost his cool and said ignorant shit to my mom? To me? More times than I could count. Sometimes it was the truth. Mom wasn’t perfect either, and neither had I been growing up, but just because something was true didn’t make it right to throw it in someone’s face. And just because what I’d said to Andrea was true didn’t make it okay.
Well, what I’d said was partially true.
I had no idea why she’d been mostly single since I’d known her. Most guys would overlook the drinking. Hell, I could overlook it if I…if I didn’t care about her. And that was the whole thing. I cared about her. A lot.
And I had hurt her.
What I’d said needed to be said, but that hadn’t been the right way to go about it. Clenching the counter, I watched what was left of the foam from the beer bubble its way down the drain. I wasn’t sure an apology was going to be enough.
“It can’t be that bad.”
I’d forgotten that Kyler was even in the room. “Oh, it was.”
“She was drunk and she…she has some issues, Tanner.”
“With anxiety?” I pushed off the counter, ready to defend the whole “issues” statement. “A lot of people have problems with that. It’s not that uncommon.”
He raised his hands. “I’m not saying it’s bad that she does or anything like that, but you’ve got to understand, that probably had some kind of influence on her reaction. You probably weren’t the only cause of what just happened.”
“Maybe,” I muttered. “But man, just trust me on this. I shouldn’t have said what I did. Not the way I said it.”
Kyler stared at me a moment. “Okay. So now I’m going to get all up in your business at the most inopportune time possible.”
I raised my brows.
“It’s obvious that you really care about her. Something went down between you two while we were camping.” He grinned in a way that kind of creeped me out. “This is great.”
I frowned. “I don’t think this is a good thing right at this moment.”
“No. It is. Well, after you apologize for being a general shithead and Andrea…well, when she feels better.” He tilted his head to the side, studying me. “It doesn’t bother you that she has anxiety issues?”
My frowned deepened. “No. Why would it?”