“Did she ever say that?”
“No. I know how much she’s struggled. She wouldn’t have had to do that if it wasn’t for me.”
“Maybe, but I doubt she’s regretted you. She couldn’t have loved you so much if she regretted you. And she loved you so much, didn’t she?”
My throat closed up. I nodded. I thought of her, of how proud she’s always been of me. No, she didn’t regret having me but I regretted that my existence made life harder for her. That’s why I couldn’t let anyone or anything interfere with my goals. I needed to be successful, not only for pride’s sake, but to have the money and power to improve my mother’s life.
And I’d been willing to do anything to make that happen. Including not allowing myself to love the man in front of me. Did it make me a bad daughter because I felt the price was too high?
Gabriel smiled. “Besides, she’s raised a magnificent woman, don’t you know?”
“Stop.” Heat touched my neck and face.
“Oh, am I making you blush? Why yes I am!”
I cleared my throat and pretended that I wasn’t flaming six shades of red. “Whatever. It’s not the right time for us to stop being careful.”
His teasing gaze softened. “Relax, baby. I’m not purposely trying to get you pregnant right now. I’m just saying that if you did get pregnant, I’d be over the moon. That’s all.”
I caught my lip with my teeth. Gabriel looked so fervent I couldn’t help but believe him—no matter how much it scared me. “You like me that much?”
“No. I love you that much.” He put me back on my feet. “Go take your shower. I’ll be back in a few minutes to join you.”
“Where are you going?”
Gabriel’s lop-sided grin quickened my breath. “To go get condoms from my apartment. Lots of them.”
“Lots?” I squeaked out.
“Oh, yes. Lots and lots of them, Emma. Boxes.” He leaned down and licked the corner of my mouth. “I’m going to f**k you raw tonight, baby, didn’t you know?”
My stomach dropped in craven anticipation. “You’re so sure of yourself.”
“No, but I do what I can to put the odds in my favor.” His fingertips stroked my side. “How am I doing so far?”
“Really, really well.”
He preened. “As I planned all along.”
“You, Sir, are not as all-powerful as you’d like to think you are.” I linked my arms around his waist. “You’re just spoiled. Simply spoiled and I’m not helping the matters any by giving you your way.”
Gabriel’s mischievous grin didn’t try to deny it. “Go now, baby. Go before I forget and give you twins right here, right now.”
Reluctantly, I let go of him. “How do you do this to me, Gabriel?” I didn’t have to explain further. He understood. He always understood me.
“Probably the same way you do it to me.”
I arched on the balls of my feet and kissed him sweetly. There was so much to talk about and go over, but right now I just wanted to revel in the rareness of being with someone who really understood me. Flaws and all.
“I’m so glad I found you again, Gabriel,” I whispered against his lips.
“I thought I found you.”
Laughter bubbled up in my throat. I leaned back, eyes closed. “I’ll crucify you for that. Later.”
“My palms itch for it, Emma.” Gabriel’s lips seared the tender spot behind my ear. “Be gentle to the man who loves you.”
I almost collapsed in a boneless heap. Somehow I managed to pull away and stepped into the shower. I peeked around the closed curtain. “Hurry, Gabriel.”
He lunged forward and captured my mouth in a heated, lusty kiss. Only when I was breathless and a near-amnesiac did he release me long enough to growl, “Wait for me.”
And just like that, Gabriel shifted the balance of power over to him. I knew it. I just didn’t care.
“Hurry.”
He left me with a wolfish grin and I waited. Just like instructed.
THREE
True to his word, Gabriel f**ked me raw. Well, maybe not quite, but I could barely move after three plus hours of lovemaking. The sound of his steady breathing lulled me into staying sprawled across his chest. I walked my fingers down his side, delighting in the jump of his taut muscles.
This felt like home. This felt right. This felt like forever and I was too satiated to be scared of the consequences, even though I knew it was bound to gnaw away at my contentment.
Gabriel had joined me in the shower only a few minutes after leaving me. He didn’t say a word. Gabriel simply allowed his touch to speak for him. His hands faithfully washed my body, exploring every curve with tender care.
Hunger overcame me. I wanted him then and there. Gabriel’s physical reaction showed he obviously felt the same, but he didn’t take what I so plainly offered. Instead, he held me back to front. One strong arm claimed the area between breast and belly. The other slid further down.
Gabriel’s fingers danced across my damp flesh. He tormented me with feather-light strokes before delving deeper. I broke apart quickly, sobbing his name while my h*ps twisted against his fingers.
Then Gabriel made me do it again. And again.
Only when I clung to him limply did he lift me up and carry me off to my bed. Normally my mind would scurry to and fro as I wondered if I needed to change the sheets into something nicer than my worn, but comfortable, striped flannel set. I was too tired to fret.
Besides, none of this was really about the sheets, was it?
Gabriel pulled back the comforter and placed me carefully in the middle of the bed. He then sat down next to me and kissed my hand. I tried to pull him towards me, needing Gabriel to join me in bed. He resisted, easily proving his muscles weren’t just for show.
Gabriel was immovable, much like his will in trapping me inside his heart. Or maybe he didn’t trap me at all. Maybe I closed the cage door behind me myself.
I laid there and submitted to his lazy-lidded gaze. I imagined myself to be his precious concubine of sort, captured for his sole pleasure. I can’t deny that I warmed to the fantasy. My limbs stretched before rearranging themselves in what felt like artful display.
“What are you thinking?” he asked softly, throaty voice sliding over me like liquid silk.
I grinned. My gaze suddenly found the ceiling interesting. “I’m wondering how much would you have paid to steal me away?”
I peeked to find the corner of Gabriel’s mouth lifted in a gorgeous smirk. He played with me so easily. “I wouldn’t have paid a single cent. I would’ve simply taken you.” My hand found its way to his lips. Gabriel’s tongue flicked along the sensitive line between thumb and palm. “Do you want to hear how it happened?”
“Yes, I do.”
“I would’ve rode into town and immediately spotted you drawing water.”
“Water? So I’d be a town wench? Or a servant girl, perhaps?”
“I’m not sure what century you’re imagining, but in my imagination you’re far from a wench.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at his haughty tone. Gabriel was perfect at sounding the aristocrat. “Really? Tell me more.”
“You were a neglected, untouched member of some despot’s harem. I, of course, could not allow you to continue in such tragic circumstances.”
“Ah, if I were a harem girl then you’d never see me. I’m afraid your story has failed.” I rubbed his lower lip, pushing lightly against the full curve.
Gabriel nipped my thumb. “I’m rearranging history to suit the story because I can.”
“Very well. Continue, my lord.”
He growled low in his throat. “Calling me ‘my lord’ like that will hardly make me want to spin pretty tales, Emma.”
“That’s not a threat, my lord.”
“Naughty girl. Now I’ll definitely tell our story.” Gabriel rested his hand on my stomach. “I invaded this despot’s kingdom, laying waste to any and all who stood in my way. I didn’t even have to force my way into the walled city. The open gates pleaded for clemency. I entered the palace only to be greeted by a kneeling army.”
I pictured the grandiose courtyard, enjoying the made-up story that only seemed romantic because of the man telling it. A psychiatrist could have a field day with the symbolism I’m sure. Still, I settled into the telling, wondering how I fit into Gabriel’s fantastical tale.
“What happened next?”
“I entered the inner court, expecting to find the soon-to-be-deposed lord waiting with a small army of guards ready to hack my body to pieces. Instead, I find you sitting by a pond.”
“I thought I was drawing water.”
“I was mistaken originally. Now hush.” Gabriel waited until I bit my lip as a sign of my silence. He petted me as reward. “So there you were, a glorious vision dressed in jade green. I summoned you to my side. Not surprisingly, you didn’t obey. Instead, you stood there with your chin raised up and dared me to do my worst. Reminds me of how you are now. Not much changes between lifetimes, do they?”
“How did you know I wasn’t bait?”
“Of course you were.”
He was quiet for so long that I had to prompt him to continue. “So then what happened?”
Gabriel fingertip drew an intricate pattern around my navel. “I approached you. You had blades in your sleeves, blades meant for me.”
“You weren’t afraid?”
“I wanted you more.”
“So did I try to kill you?”
“No. You stared me down. Just when I wondered when your knife would come for my throat, you turned around and guided me to your old master.”
“Just like that?”
“Just like that. I cannot account for what was going through your mind when you decided to spare my life. Maybe you thought you’d take it for your own later. Maybe you hated your former master and chanced a better life with me. I never knew.”
“Never?”
Gabriel’s beautiful gaze mine. Pride and yearning flashed within. “A woman’s secrets are always her own. A man can sooner move a mountain than invade where he has not been invited.”
Clever, clever man. I enjoyed his tact as much as I enjoyed his gift of fancy. “What happened next?”
“I gave the old lord a choice—his head and his kingdom or you.”
“Which one did he choose to give?”
“As if you didn’t know…you of course.” Gabriel leaned closer. His warm breath touched my collarbone. “I traded an entire kingdom to have you. My armies retreated and I rode away with the only thing I suddenly ever really wanted. The end.”
“That’s a beautiful tale, Gabriel.” I arched my back and was blessed by his lips on my skin.
“Hmm…you should’ve seen their honeymoon. Non-stop sex for those two! He almost lost control of his armies because he could barely gather the strength to hold up his sword. She nearly forgot the assassin she trained to be and became fat and happy with his babies for the next fifteen years. Thankfully her lightening quick reflexes saved many a toddler from a nasty tumble, don’t you know.”